Why do we need rules of corporate conduct? Why do we need a rule of conduct?

WHY ARE RULES NEEDED Rules... Not everyone likes them, right? Then why are they needed? Restrict us and impose bans, and, on occasion, profit from our fines? Or is there at least some positive and benefit for us in observing them? Let's figure it out. Rules of the Game Whether you play football, Mafia, charades, chess or any other game, you must always follow the rules. Do you enjoy doing this? In a game, probably yes, because the very interest for which you play is ensured by following the rules. Without rules, the game has no meaning! Of course, you can eavesdrop, deceive your opponent and break the rules when no one is looking, but in the end you will harm yourself. You will no longer get interest from the game and pleasure from an unfair victory. After all, the more difficult the task, the more pleasant it is to solve it. Of course, you could open the back of a book of puzzles and see the answer, but that wouldn’t be the same as solving it yourself, would it? Rules traffic I know, I know, opinions here will not be so clear-cut. Many drivers get annoyed by inconveniently placed signs, because of which they have to waste their time and waste extra gasoline. It is also inconvenient for pedestrians to wait for a green traffic light when there are no cars on the road. But still. Would you rather there were no traffic laws? I think no. Because, whatever one may say, they exist for our safety. When you step onto a pedestrian crossing, you know that drivers must stop, and crossing here is not dangerous to your life. But crossing the road in the wrong place, on the contrary, is dangerous. You know this yourself and will teach this to your children. In addition, compliance with these rules is more important than the previous two cases. Because not only your mood and health, but also the lives (in the literal sense of the word) of the people around you depend on their observance. Even if you are a simple pedestrian, other people, their lives, health, and well-being depend on your decision to maneuver between the flow of cars instead of reaching the crossing. And if you are a driver, then it’s not worth talking about how much trouble you can cause to others by ignoring traffic rules. Operating instructions No store will take back a watch that you, neglecting the rules of its operation, bathed in a warm bath. No one will undertake to repair the coffee grinder in which you decide to grind stones under warranty. Therefore, the creator of these devices notifies you in the operating instructions: his creation (even if it is a mass-produced creation) must be handled this way and in no other way. If you want to break these rules, you will receive a damaged item that is not suitable for further use. Yes, many people think that they know better and that manufacturers are playing it safe. However, if nothing happened in your particular case, this does not mean that the same will happen to other experimenters. Because those who are responsible for the functioning of our things know best under what conditions they can stop functioning. Is it possible to break these rules and not pay? Sometimes it is possible, but this does not mean at all that you will be lucky next time too. And if many stubbornly refuse to read the instructions for use, then what about the instructions for use, for example, of medicines? You don’t want to experiment so much anymore, do you? Rules of Life Ten Commandments written in the Bible. What can you say about them? Outdated? Not popular? Nobody lives like this anymore? Will I be considered a fool? But the Ten Commandments are the rules of the game, the rules of the road, safety precautions, and operating instructions. All in one. God is our Creator. He knows better how and why we are made. He gave us these rules not to build a wall of prohibitions and restrictions, but to make our lives better. Our life and health, as well as the lives of the people around us, will depend on whether we follow these rules. This will determine whether our body and our psyche will “break” ahead of time. This will determine whether we will truly enjoy life. If the arguments work with other rules created by people, then why are the Ten Commandments, which were instituted by God our Creator, so persistently ignored? Why are there so many arguments against them when our whole life shows that the world only needs to return to these rules. Think of any horrific incident that left you in shock. Even without knowing what it is, one can say in advance that it happened due to the fact that people do not keep the commandments given by God. Ignoring God's rules, like ignoring any others, really makes life easier in the beginning. But does it make it better? More interesting? More intense? Happier? Safer for yourself and others? We must admit that no, right? When you suddenly decide to break the rules, think about whether you would like others to break the same rule. Yes, many will have something to answer: “I’ve been living like this for so many years, and nothing is being done to me.” But if we are built differently, if violating the Ten Commandments is unnatural for us, then sooner or later we will pay for it. And anyway, wouldn’t you want to live in a world where everyone follows these rules of life? So for you, are the rules restrictions and prohibitions or safety, interest, life in accordance with purpose? You decide! Victor Maryin

Manners largely reflect a person’s internal culture, his moral and intellectual qualities. The ability to behave correctly in society is very great importance: it facilitates the establishment of contacts, promotes mutual understanding, creates good, stable relationships. Therefore, in order to raise true ladies and gentlemen, you should clearly understand why all these boring rules of etiquette are needed in society.

Description

The established moral standards are the result of a long process of developing relationships between people. Without observing these norms, political, economic, and cultural relations are impossible, because one cannot exist without respecting each other and without imposing certain restrictions on oneself.

Important! Etiquette is a word of French origin meaning manner of behavior. It includes the rules of courtesy and politeness accepted in society.

Modern etiquette inherits the customs of almost all nations from hoary antiquity to the present day. Fundamentally, these rules of conduct are universal, since they are observed not only by representatives of a given society, but also by representatives of the most diverse socio-political systems existing in modern world. The peoples of each country make their own amendments and additions to etiquette, due to social order country, national traditions and customs.

As the living conditions of mankind change, the level of education and culture grows, some rules of behavior are replaced by others. What was previously considered indecent becomes generally accepted, and vice versa. But the requirements of etiquette are not absolute: compliance with them depends on the place, time and circumstances.

Interesting to know! Behavior that is unacceptable in one place and under some circumstances may be appropriate in another place and under other circumstances.

Etiquette norms, unlike moral norms, are conditional; they have the nature of an unwritten agreement about what is generally accepted in people's behavior and what is not. Every cultured person must not only know and observe the basic norms of etiquette, but also understand the need for certain rules and relationships.

It should be noted that a tactful and well-mannered person behaves in accordance with the norms of etiquette not only at official ceremonies, but also at home. Genuine politeness, which is based on goodwill, is determined by tact, a sense of proportion, suggesting what can and cannot be done under certain circumstances. Such a person will never violate public order, will not offend another by word or deed, will not insult his dignity.

Unfortunately, there are people with a double standard of behavior: one in public, the other at home. At work, with acquaintances and friends, they are polite and helpful, but at home with loved ones they do not stand on ceremony, are rude and tactless. This indicates a person’s low culture and poor upbringing.

Important! Modern etiquette regulates the behavior of people in everyday life, at work, in public places and on the street, at a party and at various kinds of official events - receptions, ceremonies, negotiations.

So, etiquette is a very large and important part of universal human culture, morality, morality, developed over many centuries of life by all peoples in accordance with their ideas about goodness, justice, humanity - in the field of moral culture and about beauty, order, improvement, everyday expediency .

Why are standards of behavior needed?

Oddly enough, etiquette rules exist to simplify the process of communication and mutual understanding. Compliance with norms of behavior directly determines how we are perceived by people around us. Etiquette is a ready-made set of forms of politeness that allows you to communicate within the human community without thinking and almost automatically.

Etiquette is a tool with which you can achieve positive result from communicating with others like yourself. This property of etiquette today is irreplaceable in Everyday life Therefore, the rules of etiquette are constantly evolving, and today we can distinguish rules of behavior for public places, work, intra-family communication, business conferences, ceremonies and much more.

Etiquette is based on the reasonable requirement of respect and recognition of the dignity of each individual. Since man is a social being, it is quite reasonable to assume that in his daily activities, he must somehow take into account the opinions of other people surrounding him at a given moment in time.

It is not for nothing that many ancient teachers recalled the golden rule: “Treat others the way you would like them to treat you.”

Basic Etiquette

Norms and rules of behavior in society apply to all forms of human interaction with the outside world. Well-mannered behavior implies that a person reacts correctly to any events and does not respond with outbursts of anger to negativity.

Manners

Kindness and consideration for others are the most important rules social behavior. But the list of good manners is quite extensive. Let's consider the main ones:

  1. Think not about yourself, but about others. People around us prioritize sensitivity over selfishness.
  2. Show hospitality and friendliness. If you invite guests, treat them as your closest people.
  3. Be polite in your interactions. Always say hello and farewell words, thank you for the gifts and services provided not only in word, but also in deed. A letter of gratitude, although it seems like a relic of the past, will be appropriate and pleasant for the recipient.
  4. Avoid bragging. Let others judge you by your actions.
  5. Listen first, then speak. Do not interrupt your interlocutor - you will have time to express your point of view later.
  6. Don't point your finger at people or stare with piercing eyes. This confuses them, especially disabled people.
  7. Don't violate someone else's personal space - for example, don't get too close to people you don't know and don't wear stuffy perfume. Never smoke in public without asking permission from your interlocutors, especially in the presence of non-smokers - no one likes passive smoking.
  8. Avoid criticism and complaints. A person with good manners tries not to offend people with negative statements and does not complain about fate.
  9. Stay calm in all situations. Anger not only leads to unnecessary conflicts with others, but also introduces dissonance into one’s own inner world.
  10. Control your speech so as not to raise your voice, even if you start to get nervous.
  11. Be punctual. Being late shows that you don't know how to plan your day and don't value other people's time.
  12. Keep your word. An unfulfilled promise can lead to real tragedy in the life of the person you hoped for.
  13. Repay your debts on time. Failure to comply with this rule often causes not only the end of friendship and good relationships, but also serious enmity.

Cloth

Appearance business etiquette is of great importance. Business people tend to adhere not so much to fashion as to a certain level in their appearance. The basic rule when choosing clothes is its strict correspondence to the time and setting.

Business style

In most companies, the clothing style of employees is given importance Special attention; the way employees are dressed and the way they behave in the office creates a certain impression of the company’s image potential clients and partners.

In addition, the dress code fulfills a number of important functions: clothing emphasizes the specifics of a particular situation, and also plays a decisive social role, to one degree or another reflecting gender, social status, profession, financial solvency, as well as a person’s attitude to style, fashion and traditions.

Men should pay special attention to shirts:

  1. Many men prefer plain shirts, while stylists do not recommend creating a business wardrobe of plain shirts that differ from each other only in a shade of the same color. Ideally, a business man’s wardrobe should have at least ten shirts different colors and shades. Universal colors: grey, dark brown, dark blue, tan and white.
  2. IN color scheme business shirts are allowed pastel shades, however, too light pastel looks quite festive, so it is better to avoid such shades in an everyday business wardrobe.
  3. Shirts in vertical stripe quite appropriate in the wardrobe of a business man. As for the sleeve length, the only thing correct solution in this case, a classic long sleeve shirt. Hairy arms are not the most pleasant sight.
  4. The official office dress code, as well as the standard one, does not favor checkered shirts, wide bright stripes, or items with prints and designs. Clothes should not distract the attention of colleagues and partners; in some countries, a certain combination of checks or stripes is associated with belonging to a particular national or political movement, therefore, in order to avoid misinterpretation of your image, it is better to keep your business wardrobe in a monochromatic manner.

You also can’t help but pay attention to the trousers:

  1. Pants made of light fabrics distract attention from the shirt and the image as a whole. You should not wear light-colored trousers to an interview or business meeting, it is better to give preference to trousers in black, dark brown, dark blue or charcoal gray. The hem of the trousers should lie on the top of the shoe, but not gather into unsightly folds at the bottom.
  2. A shirt in the same color as the trousers creates the impression military uniform, a win-win- dark trousers and a light shirt, but not vice versa.
  3. Denim clothing is, of course, very practical, but in a business setting it is not appropriate, especially when it comes to distressed and light-colored denim. In some companies, the dress code allows the presence of jeans, but for the most part such clothing is allowed in small companies related to creativity, advertising or IT technologies.

The office dress code for women differs from that of men wide choice colors and clothing options in general.

The base of a woman's business wardrobe is discreet, elegant suits with trousers or a skirt, classic-length dresses, pencil skirts and shirt-cut blouses.

  1. In business clothes, glitter, various sequins and rhinestones, abundant embroidery and applique, bright flashy colors and prints are unacceptable. Anything that distracts attention from your professional activities is not particularly welcome from the point of view business etiquette in clothes.
  2. Representatives of the fair sex, at least those who would like to achieve career growth Using exclusively your professional qualities, you should avoid short skirts and clothes that are too tight.
  3. Business color scheme women's wardrobe– these are elegant and discreet shades, as color accent in some ensembles the presence of rich colors is allowed, for example, fuchsia, turquoise, shades precious stones.
  4. Shoes business woman– these are classic beige or black pumps or shoes with stable heels. Ballet flats and mules are comfortable, but it's best not to be seen by your boss, clients, or business partners in these shoes.

Formal dress code

Those who believe that an evening dress is necessarily a long, chic dress are mistaken. Evening holiday costumes are as varied as our everyday clothes. And the choice of one dress or another completely depends on the event that is expected. There is even a special etiquette for evening dresses.

It is clear that evening is different. There are both official and unofficial events. And if the latter allow a fairly free choice of outfits, then the former are limited to certain limits.

  1. “White Tie” is the dress code for an event that is particularly solemn. This could be an awards ceremony, a presidential reception, or other evenings of a similar level. Women's attire for such events should consist of a long dress in non-garish colors. Hands must be covered, so gloves are required. The look of an elegant lady should be completed with shoes high heels and a small handbag. Jewelry and loose hair are not allowed for this style of clothing.
  2. “Black Tie” - long or cocktail dress. Jewelry may well be used as decoration, but gloves are not necessary. In such an outfit it is quite possible to attend theater premieres or wedding banquets. Use a fur coat as a cape, although the presence of fur in clothing is not considered prerequisite for dressing up for such events.
  3. “Black tie is welcome” (Black Tea Invited) - this form of clothing is allowed at events where relatives and friends are present: corporate parties, family celebrations. Here you can easily wear a regular holiday suit as an alternative to a cocktail dress.
  4. “Black Tie Optional” is another type of clothing for loved ones and family celebrations. Here, an outfit assembled from elements of several sets is allowed.
  5. "Black tie, creativity"(Creative Black Tie) - this form of clothing is in many ways similar to Black Tie, the only difference is that non-standard solutions in putting together clothing combinations. Creativity is not prohibited, but on the contrary, it is encouraged.
  6. "Semi Formal" The dress code largely depends on what time the event starts, be it a family dinner party, a corporate event, or a dinner party. Before 18:00 you can come in a day dress or just a festive suit. If the meeting time is scheduled for the evening, then you need to wear a cocktail dress.
  7. “Cocktail Attire” - semi-formal events. Despite the name, you don’t have to limit yourself to just a cocktail dress. Festive outfits are also quite suitable.
  8. “After 5” - a similar name indicates the time of the event - after 17:00. If there are no special instructions, you can wear the same outfits as for Cocktail Attire.
  9. "Dressy Casual" - all these evenings are semi-formal. The only requirement for a woman is that she must wear clothes from famous designers.

But it must be said that etiquette is not limited to just matching the type of meeting and the dress code. The rules also apply to the level of openness of the female body. For example, a dress with a low neckline should not be worn to events that take place before 6 p.m. It is appropriate only after 20:00. And if your outfit has a deep neckline, then you can only wear it from 22:00. You can bare your shoulders only after 19:00. If your outfit includes gloves, then the following rule applies: the shorter the sleeve, the longer the glove.

If the holiday starts after 20:00, then you can wear silk kid, fabric or lace gloves, and complement your holiday clothes with a handbag made of beads, brocade or silk. A hat - if you put it on, then during the evening you will have to constantly be in it. But this is only when you are not the hostess of the evening.

In this case, you are not entitled to a hat. There are rules even on fabrics that are used for various events. So, for meetings that take place until 20:00, fashion designers suggest using clothes made of silk and wool. If we're talking about When it comes to evening dress, crepe, brocade, tarfa, silk, and lace are used. Remembering such rules of etiquette is not so difficult, but with their help you will never find yourself in an awkward situation.

The ability to present yourself

We all know that the most important thing is what is inside a person. But at the same time, we unconsciously continue to evaluate others by their appearance and behavior. And the first impression is often so strong that it can be extremely difficult to change it in the future. As a result, a person cannot climb the career ladder, win the favor of others, find his place in the team and more.

Advice! This is why it is so important to learn how to present yourself correctly when communicating with other people.

This is the only way you can form the right impression of yourself and show others how interesting personality you actually are.

To attract appropriate attention, it is not enough to wear a fashionable suit and purchase expensive accessories. If you want to present yourself correctly, then you should approach this issue comprehensively.

  1. Define your strengths . You must understand what exactly sets you apart from others. For example, you can make decisions quickly, easily win over other people, and have an excellent sense of humor. Having understood your unique qualities, do not hide them from others, but actively demonstrate and put them into practice.
  2. Learn to be proud of what you have. No matter how gray and boring our lives may sometimes seem to us, in reality, each of us has something that we could be sincerely proud of. Cozy apartment, a collection of retro records, interesting work, talented children, true friends. Enjoy these moments and don't be afraid to show them off a little to others.
  3. Don't be afraid to talk about your achievements. Even if some time has passed since then. Excessive modesty can decorate few people. And you shouldn’t be afraid that others will consider you overly arrogant. Talking about your youth sporting achievements or trying to learn Spanish on your own, you will only allow others to know and understand you better.
  4. Don't be afraid to leave your comfort zone. This rule applies to both work and personal life. Sometimes you need to do what scares you the most - ask your boss for a promotion, be the first to start a conversation with someone you're interested in, volunteer to organize a party, and more. Let such beginnings not always end desired result, but you can certainly use them to attract positive attention.
  5. Make your life more fulfilling. Most of us know only work and home, we have few hobbies and are almost not interested in anything. It is not surprising that such people are perceived as mediocre. If you have caught yourself that your life is becoming more and more gray and monotonous every day, then it’s time to give it back bright colors. Try to get carried away with something, find new friends, go on a trip. New experiences will make your eyes glow, which will be instantly noticed by the people around you.
  6. Don't be afraid to seem stupid. If you try to keep a low profile and don't want to attract unnecessary attention to yourself for fear of saying something inappropriate, then you are wrong. People will instantly open up to you if you stop avoiding them. In this case, your knowledge or communication skills will play virtually no role.
  7. Be friendly. If you want to form a positive opinion of yourself among others, then try to be as open as possible when communicating with other people. Your friendliness will be immediately noticed and appreciated. Remember that positive and open people achieve much more in life than gloomy and withdrawn people, no matter how talented they actually are.

Rules of etiquette

For men and women general rules etiquette are somewhat different.

For men

The image of a well-mannered young man consists not only of the ability to behave well towards a woman. Opening the door for a lady, letting her pass in front of you, or helping her carry a heavy bag is, of course, good, but the rules of etiquette for men do not end there. Polite speech, culture of behavior, a well-chosen suit and much more are also an integral part.

There are 14 basic rules of conduct for men towards women that every self-respecting modern young man should know:

  1. On the street, a young man must accompany a lady, walking to her left. WITH right side Only military personnel have the right to go to salute if necessary.
  2. If a girl stumbles or slips, the man must hold her by the elbow. Although in real circumstances the choice remains with the lady.
  3. Good manners They do not allow you to smoke in front of a lady, only after her consent.
  4. A real man always lets a lady pass first, having first opened the door for her.
  5. When going up or down the steps, the young man is obliged to support his companion if necessary, for this he is a couple of steps away from her.
  6. When entering an elevator, a man must enter first, and when exiting, let a girl pass first.
  7. The first to get out of the car is a young man who, walking around the car, opens the door on the passenger side, giving the lady his hand. If a man is a transport driver, then he is obliged to open the front passenger door and help the lady get in. In case the gentleman is also a passenger, he and his companion need to sit in the back seat. It should be remembered that in this case, the girl first gets into the car, and then the man sits next to her.
  8. When entering a room, a man helps a lady take off her coat, and when leaving it, he must help her put it on.
  9. In modern world young man You are not supposed to find a seat if a woman is standing.
  10. According to etiquette, a young man needs to arrive at a meeting before a lady, so as not to put her in an uncomfortable situation if he is late. In emergency cases, you should notify the girl about this and apologize to her.
  11. A man must help every woman convey big bags or any bulky items. These do not include a woman's handbag, as well as small fur coats and coats, unless the lady is unable to carry her things herself due to her health.
  12. The main mistake A young man's behavior when communicating with someone is crossing his arms, as well as fiddling with something in his hands. This is considered a sign of disrespect for the opponent.
  13. When going to a restaurant, the gentleman comes in first so that the head waiter can make the right conclusions about who invited whom and who will pay the bill. At large quantities The first person to enter is the one who will pay and is the initiator of the invitation.
  14. While in company, a young man is forbidden to talk about frank topics in front of a girl; it is better to choose light, unobtrusive subjects for discussion.

For women

There is a certain set of rules that will help avoid awkward moments in life situations, which every girl finds herself in every day.

  1. When you meet someone you know on the street, be sure to greet him. Consider the closeness of your relationship. You shouldn’t show excessive emotions too loudly and violently or try to call out to a friend across the street, just meet your eyes and nod to each other.
  2. Avoid on-the-go snacking outside. Firstly, there is a high probability of choking, and secondly, you may accidentally stain a random passerby. This also applies to eating in shops or other public places not intended for this purpose.
  3. During telephone conversation make sure your voice is not too loud. If this is not possible, move away from the main crowd - your negotiations should not be public.
  4. Do not sort things out in public if you do not want to receive condemnation from others. You shouldn't kiss your boyfriend passionately either.
  5. Don't get into arguments with strangers. If you have been reprimanded, even unfairly, it is better to apologize or remain silent. Remember that you are a real lady.
  6. Try not to be late for meetings and arrive on time if you are invited to visit. Punctuality is an elementary rule of decency that any woman must observe. If, despite everything, you realize that you won’t make it in time, be sure to call in advance and let them know how long you will be delayed.
  7. Watch your posture and gestures during a conversation. Your movements should be restrained, smooth, feminine, and should not attract attention or shock.
  8. The girl's makeup must match the situation. During the day and for work, it is better to choose neutral decorative cosmetics in natural tones, but for an evening social event you can apply bright lipstick and eye shadow with glitter.
  9. A trip to a restaurant begins with studying the menu and placing an order. Don’t be afraid to ask the waiter, for example, about the ingredients, serving method, and cooking time.
  10. If the waiter brings your order earlier than others, do not immediately grab the fork and knife. In this case, you need to wait until everyone has plates on the table.
  11. Defiant behavior always repels others, especially men, at any stage of relationship development. Remember that a woman should always remain a mystery and understatement, so you should not violently express your emotions - do not forget about restraint.
  12. Don't be too intrusive. Even if the relationship is going through a “candy-bouquet” period, you should not often call or write messages to your partner. Only one call from a woman should be every three to four calls from a man.
  13. You shouldn’t be too indifferent and arrogant a girl either. This will be perceived as disrespectful and will put off a potential partner.
  14. Be happy to let a man look after you, but don’t wait or demand that, for example, they open the door or give you flowers.

For children

By teaching children etiquette and giving them a set of guiding principles, we are actually equipping them with tools to help them be heard, developing their faith in own capabilities and set us up for future success.

So, here is a list of etiquette rules that parents should teach their children.

  1. Greet the person by name, and if you don't know their name, ask. Greeting them by name is a sign of respect that tells the person that you value them. Therefore, it is important to teach children to always greet adults by name and patronymic or ask if they do not know their name.
  2. Never be afraid to ask again if you have forgotten the name of the person you are talking to: people understand that sometimes children can forget names. Everyone does it. In this case, the phrase: “Sorry, I can’t remember your name, could you remind me of it?” is quite acceptable.
  3. Try to look your interlocutor in the eyes: looking into a person’s eyes while communicating with him is useful not only for children, but also for adults. Also, teach children not to be distracted; otherwise, the interlocutor will receive a signal that you are not interested in him. A look into the eyes is simple, but effective method help children win the heart of every adult they meet life path. Of course, if such eye contact is typical for a given culture and social norms.
  4. Remembering details and actively listening: This is a simple rule of good manners, but it has a significant impact on how other people perceive you. Remembering names and specific details (such as illness or recent return from vacation) suggests care and respect.
  5. Be aware - stop and look around: children are often blissfully unaware of their surroundings. For them, one impulse replaces another. For example, you came to the zoo with your kids, and while you are looking at the elephants, they suddenly notice something interesting in another place. Without thinking for a second about what is around them, the kids run headlong and almost fall under the wheels of an elderly man's wheelchair, who begins to worry and get angry for obvious reasons.
  6. Red light, yellow light, green light: You may have noticed that teachers, swimming and soccer coaches, and many other adult mentors in your children's lives use this valuable tool. By using the green light as permission to “go,” the yellow light to “slow down,” and the red light to “stop,” you can control children’s movements and movements without raising your voice. Start using this method as early as possible and introduce it to your kids as a game. Soon, with practice, they will become very good at determining when they can “go,” when they should “slow down,” and when they should “stop.”
  7. Keep your hands away from the glass: this rule may seem a little funny. Teach children not to touch with their hands, especially dirty ones, glass surfaces to keep them stain-free, and your dance teacher, store owner, librarian, doctor and many other people will be very grateful to you.
  8. Eating off someone else's plate - even mom's plate - is a bad idea: Some families play a game where you can "steal" food from each other's plates. It can be very funny and acceptable at home when the whole family participates and enjoys the game, but it stops being funny when it involves someone who doesn't understand this kind of joke. Eating food from another person's plate is unacceptable. It is much better to politely ask for more, even if mom or dad has to help the child get it from their plate.
  9. Napkin on lap, elbows off table: These days, these etiquette rules are considered old-fashioned and many people take them a little casually. However, since different families have different traditions, children should be taught these table manners so that they remain on top in any situation.
  10. Don't reach for anything. An old but true rule. Etiquette rules do not allow you to reach across the table for anything. Every parent knows the disappointment that occurs when a child turns a glass over and spills its contents on dinner table. In order not to spill tea on your neighbor's lap and not make everyone sitting at the table nervous, you need to politely ask them to give you what you want.
  11. When talking to adults, wait to be addressed: this is a rather old-fashioned rule that has lost its appeal in modern times. last decades. However, in today's technological world, where it is difficult to tell when an adult is busy, it is actually very important that children do not interrupt a person when he is speaking.
  12. Watch your words: previously bullying and harassment (bullying) only happened in person. Most parents teach their children that it is important to show kindness in personal interactions with people because bullying is unacceptable. However, mean comments and insults have now moved into cyberspace and are often beyond the control of adults. Make every effort to make children understand that words can hurt another person.

How to behave in society?

The rules of etiquette, also known as the basic rules of respect and politeness, work both ways. You show them towards another person, he shows them towards you.

This way everyone wins. But there are several nuances that are worth recalling and clarifying for every self-respecting person:

  1. Never come to visit without calling. If you are visited without warning, you can afford to wear a robe and curlers.
  2. Whoever you are - a director, an academician, an elderly woman or a schoolboy - when entering the room, say hello first.
  3. Handshake: It is not customary to shake hands with women, but if she extends her hand to a man first, she should shake it, but not as firmly as men.
  4. Rules for paying for an order in a restaurant: if you say the phrase “I invite you,” this means you pay. If a woman invites a business partner to a restaurant, she pays. Another formulation: “Let’s go to a restaurant,” - in this case, everyone pays for themselves, and only if the man himself offers to pay for the woman, can she agree.
  5. The umbrella is never dried open - neither in the office nor at a party. It needs to be folded and placed in a special stand or hung.
  6. The bag should not be placed on your lap or on your chair. A small elegant clutch bag can be placed on the table, a large bag can be hung on the back of a chair or placed on the floor if there is no special chair (these are often served in restaurants). The briefcase is placed on the floor.
  7. Golden Rule when using perfume - moderation. If in the evening you smell your own perfume, know that everyone else has already suffocated.
  8. If you are walking with someone and your companion says hello to a stranger, you should say hello too.
  9. Cellophane bags are only acceptable when returning from the supermarket, as are paper branded bags from boutiques. Carrying them with you later as a bag is redneck.
  10. A man never wears women's bag. And he takes a woman’s coat only to carry it to the locker room.
  11. Home clothes are trousers and a sweater, comfortable but decent looking. The robe and pajamas are designed to go to the bathroom in the morning, and from the bathroom to the bedroom in the evening.
  12. From the moment your child settles in a separate room, learn to knock when entering his room. Then he will do the same before entering your bedroom.
  13. The man always enters the elevator first, but the one closest to the door exits first.
  14. In a car, the most prestigious place is considered to be behind the driver, a woman occupies it, a man sits next to her, and when he gets out of the car, he holds the door and gives the lady his hand. If a man is driving, it is also preferable for a woman to take a seat behind him. However, no matter where the woman sits, the man must open the door for her and help her out.
  15. Talking publicly about the fact that you are on a diet is bad form. Moreover, under this pretext one cannot refuse dishes offered by a hospitable hostess. Be sure to praise her culinary talents, while you don't have to eat anything. The same should be done with alcohol. Don't tell everyone why you can't drink. Ask for dry white wine and sip lightly.
  16. Taboo topics for small talk: politics, religion, health, money.
  17. Every person over 12 years of age must be addressed as “you.” It’s disgusting to hear people say “you” to waiters or drivers. Even to those people with whom you know well, it is better to address them as “you” in the office, but only as “you” in private. The exception is if you are peers or close friends.

Business Etiquette

Below are the main characteristics of etiquette business communication. By following them, a person will be able to inspire confidence in himself and climb up the career ladder in a relatively short period of time.

These norms cannot be discarded or pretended that they do not exist at all. Etiquette business people comes with certain rules that cannot be ignored. Let's take a closer look at them.

  1. Politeness
    The etiquette of business interaction implies that the interlocutor must be addressed with emphatic politeness. Even if you are talking with someone who is obviously unpleasant to you, you should not show your true attitude. Politeness is an integral part of business communication etiquette. It is difficult to imagine the head of a serious enterprise who would be highly emotional and impressionable. Etiquette teaches you to restrain your emotions and suppress them at the right moment. Otherwise, a person simply will not be able to fully manage a team and monitor the work of other people.
  2. Control of emotions
    The etiquette of business interaction suggests that demonstrating your emotions in front of people is unacceptable. In the presence of business partners or colleagues, you should not show fears, doubts, or uncertainty. All this has no place in the world of business or even just in the workplace. Otherwise, a person will never be able to feel protected, but will become vulnerable to any jokes, gossip and gossip from those around him. It is unlikely that anyone would want to become the subject of negative discussions or acquire a reputation as an unrestrained, ill-mannered person. Controlling emotions allows you to avoid unnecessary questions, maintain your own reputation and gain the respect of colleagues, subordinates and superiors for yourself.
  3. Punctuality
    You should arrive on time to any meeting. Whatever the subject of discussion concerns, whatever aspects it touches on, the time of arrival at the place of negotiations must be strictly observed. It is better to arrive ten to fifteen minutes earlier than to be late and make everyone wait for you alone. Being late means showing disrespect business partners who gathered in a specific place to discuss important issues.
  4. Confidentiality of information
    Business interaction etiquette implies that all available information that is of undeniable importance should not be disclosed to third parties. Outsiders should not have anything to do with what is happening at all and should not know any details of the business transactions taking place. Data confidentiality helps make the process of business cooperation as convenient and mutually beneficial as possible. If you do not pay enough attention to the issue of business etiquette, you can find yourself in a very awkward and difficult situation.
  5. Speech control
    Business etiquette means that you need to think carefully about your speech. Before saying anything out loud, it is better to make sure that the chosen phrases and their meaning are correct. Speech control allows you to achieve a positive effect in negotiations and avoid awkward situations that may accidentally arise under the influence of emotions.

Etiquette in public transport

According to statistics, we spend on average an hour a day in transport. Someone is pushing, someone is smelling perfume, and someone is leaning on your leg with an umbrella-cane half the time. And there is nothing pleasant about such trips.

To make life easier for each other and make daily “travels” more enjoyable, you should adhere to simple rules etiquette:

  1. Has the carriage arrived? No need to break down doors, let people leave and then just come in. Don't push small children forward so they can run in and sit down. On the one hand, this is ugly, on the other hand, they can simply be demolished by people leaving, especially during rush hour.
  2. If you want to help an elderly person (child, pregnant woman, visually impaired) board a vehicle, you must first ask whether they need it.
  3. When entering transport, you must remove backpacks and large bags from your shoulders so as not to cause inconvenience to other citizens. Even large handbags should be taken off the shoulder and kept at knee level.
  4. All seats in the metro, trolleybuses, trams are intended for older people, with disabilities, for expectant mothers and passengers with small children. If these people are sitting and there are still empty seats, then women are allowed to take them.
  5. If a man is on public transport with a companion, then he must thank the one who gave up his seat to her.
  6. It is better to give up your seat after making visual contact. This will help you understand whether a person needs such courtesy. You shouldn’t stand up silently and show a person to your place. You should say the phrase: “Please sit down.”
  7. It's not nice to look at your neighbor's book or phone number. Look closely at the passengers too.
  8. Many people do not tolerate strong odors well, so if possible, you should not pour a bottle of perfume on yourself and get on public transport after you have dined on a spicy burrito with garlic - use chewing gum.
  9. Sitting with your legs spread wide or stretched across the entire aisle is not beautiful - you are taking away space from people.

Psychological lesson for younger teenagers

A psychologist at school is a special person: sometimes they trust him more than close people, he knows how to listen, understand and advise something. He can tell you a lot of interesting and important things: what the child’s soul asks for. During the lessons, relationships are business-like and regulated, but in these lessons you can get closer and try to understand each other. Confidential conversations or spontaneous games can get everyone on the same wavelength, which will be enhanced by the unexpected unity that appears. Discovering the vastness within oneself is very scary at first, but later becomes terribly interesting.

Purpose of the lesson: to form in students the need to comply with norms of behavior.

Tasks:

Give an idea of ​​the need to regulate human relationships;

Develop the ability to relate your own feelings with the feelings of others.

Equipment: blackboard, chalk, student workbooks for writing.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

Leading. Guys! Today we have an unusual activity. We will conduct a real scientific study with you! Who can say what the word "research" means? (Students' answers are heard.)

In general, you defined everything correctly. Yes, this is learning something new, still unknown to others. But scientific Research is different in that from the very beginning the scientist poses a question to which he seeks an answer through research. Before writing down any very serious and important statement, scientists conduct many experiments. They make sure to check whether their conclusions are correct.

So today we will try to ask ourselves a question and find an answer to it through experimentation.

First, we will open the notebooks in which we will write down the date and on a new line - “Experiment”. And here is the question to which we will look for an answer (we will write it on a new line):

Why does a person need different rules in life?

Can you answer this question now, without experimenting? (Children vying with each other to express a variety of versions.)

What did we get? Each of you thinks differently, there is no agreement between you. And the most interesting thing is that everyone says correctly. So? It is precisely in order to find one answer for everyone, while studying the problem (and you and I have a problem: there is no consensus), scientists conduct experiments. This means that an experiment should always have a goal: For what you have to do this and that.

So let’s write in our notebooks on a new line: “The goal is to find the reason that makes people live according to the rules.”

(At this time, the teacher draws a blank for the game “tic-tac-toe” on the board. Children will happily recognize this drawing.)

Draw a field for playing tic-tac-toe in your notebooks, and let's begin our experiment! I promise you that I can defeat everyone! (Some of the guys do not agree with this statement.) Let's see, let's see.... So, I'm starting first.

Walking around the class, the leader draws a cross in any cell in each notebook. Then he invites the children to make a return move with “toe” and continues the game. Having reached the third move, teacher, breaking the rules of the game, he crosses out the crosses the way he wants, declaring to each student: “I won!” This causes a stormy protest. But you need to get to the very last player, continuing to break the rules. The most “noisy” ones can be calmed down by whispering in their ears that they need to wait until the end of the experiment.

Oh! How you scream! Why?

The children shout vyingly:

– You broke the rule!

- They don’t play like that!

- You can not do it this way!

- Why are you doing this?

- This is unfair!

What I did? That's right, I violated rule! Now let's calm down and, like real scientists, try to find the answer: what happened? What caused such a cry and such indignation? First, let's try to look into ourselves, “with our pupils inside,” as the British say.

(The children gradually calm down.)

Try to answer the question: “How did you feel when I declared myself the winner against the rules? What feelings appeared at your place?”

(The teacher asks each person, writing the answer on the board.)

So, indignation, feeling that you have been deceived, resentment, thoughtfulness, dissatisfaction, shock, irritation, anger, anger...

Let's write down these words that tell about your condition in notebooks.

Tell me, are these feelings light, pleasant or dark, ugly?

(It almost sounds like a chorus that these are dark, ugly feelings.)

That's how! You unanimously decided that these were dark, ugly feelings! Unanimously, guys! Everyone felt the same, everyone said the same. And what did you want to do when suddenly you felt the pain of resentment?

That's right, you started screaming! Why? Because I didn’t want to stop right away in my violations, but you couldn’t stop me! So?

(This time, surprisingly, the children no longer scream, they try to speak more calmly. You can see how they slowly analyze themselves, their feelings in the context of words and actions.)

What conclusion can we draw? Right. When someone breaks the rules, the other person feels bad: he feels that his good mood and hope destroyed, broken. Does everyone agree? Then we will write down the conclusion in notebooks: “By breaking the rules, a person destroys the bright feelings of another person.”

Guys! Can we now answer our question: “ For what does a person need rules in life?”

(Children's answers are heard.)

Does this mean that living by the rules can help people be kinder?

Will other people treat us well if we break the rules?

So For what do people need rules?

Now you should try to answer the question yourself. complex issue which you have asked me many times. " Why Does it happen that teachers sometimes or often raise their voices at you during class? What does it mean raised tone of the teacher's voice?

(Almost unanimously, the guys agree that this is the result of not just “bad” student behavior, but a violation of the rules of behavior in the lesson. It is proposed to name the rules of behavior in the lesson known to students.)

Guys! Did you enjoy doing the experiment? Experimental method You on one's own were able to determine how you should behave not only in class, but also in everyday life. If you and I want to live in peace, if you and I want to have many friends, if you and I don’t want to destroy our good mood, we must remember our conclusion: “By breaking the rules, we destroy the bright feelings towards us on the part of the other person. We are losing friends. We begin to be offended, cry, suffer. And all just because we ourselves do not follow the rules established in society.”

Violation of the rules leads the whole world of human relations to the state that you yourself called. And you yourself said that these are dark, ugly feelings, they destroy people’s relationships.

As I say goodbye to you today, I would like to wish you to always remember that your good mood depends only on whether you know how to follow the rules.

P The lesson presented to your attention was taught in fifth grade. According to the same methodological development The lesson was also held in sixth grades. The result was stunning. For the first time, the children (this was reflected on their faces during the discussion) thought that the teacher is also a person and he has the right to feelings. The point is that during the discussion it is necessary to pay some attention teacher's feelings in relation to those who violate the rules of behavior in the classroom.

Children, younger teenagers, and sometimes even quite “adult” older teenagers quite often endow teachers with unpleasant epithets, label them, form an attitude towards them, which is later transferred to the subject that the teacher teaches. But after this lesson, the students suddenly discovered the reason for the teachers’ irritation.

In saying this, it is worth noting that the source of the violation is sometimes not one student, but several people, and more than once during the lesson. Invite students to think about whether it is possible to add up those “dark” feelings that they themselves named and place them in the heart of one person - the teacher. Children readily agree that this is exactly what often happens. After this, ask the “backfill” question: “Is it possible to pay for good with evil? The teachers who teach you give you new knowledge. Is it possible to kindle suffering and pain in a person’s soul by thinking only about one’s momentary desires and whims?”

After this frank conversation, the children are ready to discuss the rules that must be followed in class so as not to offend the teacher, so as not to turn him against themselves. The slowness of children's reactions to these questions indicates that they began to think...

Indeed, it is not easy for teachers, especially young ones, to maintain discipline. Under the onslaught of children's energy, some abandon the mission of an educator and concentrate their efforts on teaching functions, artificially driving themselves into the framework of guidelines and recommendations. And this is precisely what will serve as a source of emotional burnout in the future: no feedback, no creativity, no strength to work. Some teachers develop a defense that destroys many of the positive initiatives reflected in the programs. And no matter how many teachers are taught to react correctly to violations, taking into account the reasons for this very violation, they are still reactive according to essence, because the students themselves teach them to be reactive...

Modern requirements for keeping diaries prohibit writing comments about a student’s behavior in them; teachers are only allowed to invite parents for consultation. Overworked parents postpone the visit for an indefinite period of time, and at this very time the child develops the habit of bad behavior. And is it legal to shift the upbringing of a child from the shoulders of professionals only to the shoulders of mothers, grandmothers and fathers? Their methods are sometimes terrifying. And some teachers consider it unacceptable to be distracted by discipline, since there is already not enough time to “run” the program. So it turns out that a psychologist can help a teacher, and his help will be effective. You just need to be included in the system of real and large-scale problems of a modern school.

There are people who live by general rules, and there are people who live by their own rules. Let's figure it out a little.

How they live ordinary people? Do they follow the rules? Yes, they do. But whose rules are these? These are someone else's rules. People simply obey some kind of routine, some way of life. "Just like others".

This is neither good nor bad. It just is. And what does their life look like? Monotonous. Home-work-home. Such people are not interested in anything. Nothing makes them happy. Most often they complain about their life. They complain about the government, about circumstances, about others, about neighbors, about the boss, about husband/wife, about everyone. The only entertainment is TV series or football with beer. Here, who cares.

And such people are not to blame for living this way and not otherwise. It’s just that no one taught them or told them what could and should be done differently. They are zombified by the news on TV. They fall under the influence of the general gray mass, where everything new and unusual is perceived with hostility. Where a step to the left, a step to the right are regarded as an attempt to escape. Where any group of like-minded people is called a sect.

And you don’t have to figure out what’s really going on there. The main thing is to quickly brand, blacken, label and be proud of yourself, for about five minutes, for not falling under the influence of “sectarians”. And again TV, accusations, complaints...

How do the rich and famous live?

You may be surprised, but they live by their own rules. They have clearly defined laws of their lives that they adhere to. Everyone has their own laws, their own rules and principles. But the essence is basically the same. This is a focus on the goal, this is devotion to values, this is the willingness to accept new things, and faith in yourself, faith in others. Respect for people. Anyone.

Recently I had the opportunity to be in the company of smart, rich and quite famous people. I could observe their behavior, their manners. Listen to what they say, see what they do. And even communicate with them. And it turned out that this simple people. They are not arrogant, not prudish. They say hello to everyone. Everyone smiles. They are always ready to help. But not everyone.

They do charity work, helping those who cannot cope on their own. But if you come to ask for a loan, they will refuse you. But if you ask for advice in the business you are about to start, they will tell you where you can come across pitfalls and how to get around them.

And what do you choose? Write your own rules and live by them? Or merge with the gray mass and complain and blame?

Personally, I chose the first option. I wrote down my rules for life. I wrote down my rules for the day. And now I live by them. And my life began to improve.

I have no time to complain. And no one. I'm fine. And every day it gets better!

Do you have your own rules? Write in the comments!

IN modern companies managers pay great attention to corporate culture, but employees in most cases treat such efforts as eccentricities, perceiving them rather as an indicator of excessive health and irrepressibility of the manager: “If the bosses are not eccentric, then they are ill.”

This attitude is largely justified. Managers, for example, often don't know exactly what the status of projects is or how much excess items are stuck in the warehouse. Therefore, attention paid to rules of corporate conduct may seem inappropriate or untimely to employees.

But the problem that forces managers to address the topic corporate rules, very serious. To appreciate the significance of the rules, it is enough to note: any management system is based on instructions that describe the mutual actions of employees, while the concepts of “action” and “behavior” are not identical. It would seem that for normal operation, instructions that logically regulate actions are quite sufficient. However, forms of behavior, unlike production actions, are not particularly subject to logic. The emotionality inherent in everyone can greatly influence behavior.

With a poorly configured management system, it’s bad for everyone - both managers and subordinates. As a rule, in such situations, employees have serious reasons to express dissatisfaction. Instructions, i.e., work rules, determine what the manager may be dissatisfied with, for example, low quality results, missed deadlines, or inaccurate knowledge of the situation. And the rules of corporate behavior regulate the ways of expressing this displeasure.

The desire to spoil the mood of employees for reasons unrelated to work can be called emotional despotism. And this is where the importance of the rules of corporate behavior becomes clear! They are designed to limit acceptable forms of behavior and thereby humanize the atmosphere in the team. The rules are aimed at limiting the emotional incontinence of some and preserving the sense of personal dignity of others, which ultimately allows all participants in the working relationship to maintain mutual respect.

To be fair, it should be said that the humanization of working relationships is an extremely difficult task - primarily because climate change in the team occurs slowly. But if the company's top officials are interested in a healthy atmosphere, the problem can be solved.

The humanization of working relationships faces not only the manifestation of emotional incontinence of superiors, but also the misunderstanding by subordinates of a correct and emotionally restrained attitude towards themselves. Once upon a time, my manager spoke to the effect that the vast majority of people are not inclined to adequately perceive good treatment towards themselves. He meant that the goodwill and correctness of a leader can be perceived by subordinates as undemandingness, as a reason for dishonesty. If the boss does not shout or swear, then his orders can be ignored, and he himself cannot be taken seriously.

The creation and application of rules of corporate conduct achieve results in almost the opposite direction. On the one hand, a working environment arises in which friendly relations between employees are considered natural, and on the other hand, conditions are simultaneously created in which the presentation of mutual demands is perceived as the norm of conscientious professional relations. "Nothing personal just business".

The manager is interested in effective use the potential of each employee. In order for employees to work with full dedication, they must want to. This means that it is impossible to work productively with offended employees. Anything can happen in business relationships - it is precisely for this “anything” that rules of corporate behavior should be created.

Felix Schmiedel, director and partner of the consulting company Orgo-System