The human mind can handle anything but catastrophic disorder. No one can lead a completely unorganized life full of chaos. Yes, a teenager's messy room can look quite chaotic, but the owner made his own decisions about it. appearance. He just chose chaos, and as long as there is a choice, one cannot talk about complete disorganization. But does disorganization exist at all? Is what is happening random, or does everything have a special, higher meaning? Let's try to understand this difficult issue.

Accidents in life

In fact, life is sometimes filled with accidents; there is even a separate scientific field dedicated to this. And atoms collide by chance, and random modifications of animals move forward the evolution described by Darwin. A lot can happen in nature; it is filled with accidents, which is not easy for a person to realize simply due to the orderliness of his thoughts, although people are sometimes visited by sudden impulses, whims, and attacks of emotions. Even a scientist who is busy studying random atoms does not consider that he is doing something uncertain. He has specific goal, a specific meaning, and it moves in its direction, although from the outside the process may seem quite chaotic and disorganized.

The meaning of chance

So how can you break out of this vicious circle of ordered actions and begin to notice meaningful coincidences in random events? Just think about the expression itself, because something meaningful has a purpose, and a coincidence is random by definition. The truth is that a sense of trust will help you find meaning in the chaotic flow of events around you. Believe that somewhere above in everything that happens there is also meaning, purpose and direction - somewhere in the mystical sphere, which controls the events of life. This is the meaning of the expression “nothing happens for nothing”: the accidents of life are predetermined. However, this is quite difficult to prove. This idea exists as a general belief, as a postulate of faith or as a dream, and for some - as all this at once, in different combinations.

How is it really going?

Perhaps this idea is difficult to accept because it is not formulated entirely correctly. It would be much more correct to say: “Everything happens with specific purpose, despite the fact that it seems otherwise." Life is not limited to these events; it can combine pronounced order with chaotic accidents. Let's go back to the teenager again. There is order in his daily trips to school, but in his bedroom there is chaos. Note the key word “seems.” Everything may seem random, although in reality it is completely different. There may be a reason for everything, you just don't know it. Einstein may have seemed like an ordinary clerk at the Swiss patent office, but in fact he was pondering critical issues physics. Creative people seem just distracted, and at this moment they come up with a masterpiece! When a person cannot read, the letters appear to be scattered randomly across the page, when in fact they are arranged in a very specific way. Once you realize that it is impossible to assess the situation at first glance, new opportunities will open up for you.

Key Features

Randomness itself may be a misleading term. The great Dutch philosopher Spinoza believed that there is nothing random in nature. Everything that seems random to us appears so only because we do not have enough knowledge to understand the situation. Our perception is the main difficulty on the path to understanding. We look at a chain of unpredictable events and believe that they are random because we cannot look at what is happening from the other side. If you look at the artist's painting through a magnifying glass, it seems that his brush uses absolutely different colors, but if you look differently and see the whole picture, the story he paints will become clear.

How to create your own story?

First of all, understand that it is illogical to expect life events to conform to clear rules; cause and effect do not work in the usual way. What is happening can be described mechanical laws, for example, if you kick a ball, it will fly into the air, and if you hit a person, then there will definitely be a reaction, but not so predictable for you personally. The thing is that the processing of events in the brain does not imply a straight line of analysis of events; it is not a way to connect event A with cause B.
There is a whole cloud of reasons and thoughts in the head, it is not straightforward, it is supplemented by memories, upbringing, habits, reason, emotions, relationships, genetic code and many hidden biological factors. And in this cloud your brain is looking for a specific solution - the process is much more complicated than clear scientific explanation. So how can you control the story of your life? Firstly, we already make up our own stories when we cannot explain what is happening, because living in complete uncertainty is uncomfortable. You can control the way you explain to yourself everything that happens around you. This will be your essence and your story.

Unusual conclusion

After all the previous thoughts, we can come to an intriguing conclusion. The history of each person is made up of a combination of chance and chaos, so maybe reality is always ordered and meaningful, and we determine the volume of ordered events ourselves? Each person decides for himself how to perceive the flow of life events. Everything happens for a reason, if you believe in it, if you find a hidden meaning in it. You cleanse your existence of chaos if you simply believe in order. However, trust is not enough. This is just one necessary part. In addition to trust, you will need the ability to establish partnerships between yourself and higher powers. We are not talking about something mystical here, but about aspects of your own consciousness. About invisible forces that include creativity, intuition, intentions. Find a balance between yourself and nature, draw on age-old wisdom - and notice that there really is order in everything that surrounds you. Don’t put off your search for meaning for too long - learn to notice the special order in the things around you right now.

People are designed that way that they always want something. The simplest wish, for example, is for everything to be fine. Health, work, family, home, money, leisure and other human joys. But unfortunately, not everyone’s affairs turn out the way they want. Conflicts in the family and at work, health problems, lack of money and other unhappy factors poison our lives.

There are many desires, and most of them cannot be realized for a variety of reasons. Of course, we succeed in doing something, but often with great effort and so slowly that we get tired of waiting.

Why is everything not the way you want? The answer to this and most other questions can be obtained by considering

Why does a person come to earth?

Do we really come into this world to suffer? Some religious systems claim that this is so. You can earn heaven by suffering. But not everyone suffers, although any religion claims that we are all equal before God. And the “starting conditions” at birth are different for everyone. You can be born into a wealthy family and not have problems all your life. Or you can be born sick and never see your parents. Some are healthy, some are beautiful, some are lucky. But not me. Why?

Such “inequality” can be explained if we accept as possible that a person comes to this earth more than once. The immortal part of a person - his soul, after the death of his physical shell, after some time he moves into another body. Therefore, the conditions in which a person was born today (family, health, etc.) are determined by the circumstances of his past life. This phenomenon is called reincarnation. We hope that if there are convinced atheists among the readers of Z&S, they will generously forgive us for these reasonings.

However, 80% of people at birth have conditionally equal “starting opportunities” and, potentially, they can achieve for themselves everything that can be had in this life. They can, but they don’t achieve it. Why?

The fact is that every person, coming into this world, has certain obligations and requirements are presented to him that he must comply with. Who makes these demands? Nature, Higher powers, God, Creator, Absolute - call it what you want. If a person lives according to the rules established from above, then he achieves everything he wants. In principle, our planet is precisely a paradise, because here you have the opportunity to enjoy everything you want: beautiful nature, food, love, creativity, communication, creation. But, unfortunately, people do not know the rules that they must follow if they want to live well. As a result, they violate them and life becomes torture. This means that in order to get rid of problems, you need to learn these rules of behavior in life and follow them.

From here we can draw the following conclusion: a person comes into this world to try everything that is here: creativity and work, fame and wealth, love and sex, entertainment and travel. Of course, at the same time, he should not violate the rules of conduct in life that are established by the Higher Powers.

What rules should we follow?

I’m 40 years old and everything in my life didn’t turn out exactly the way I wanted, I feel like in an ancient Greek tragedy, in it the hero always wants one thing and the result is the opposite, my family considers me a failure, a defective product, crazy, I feel that way myself , my only child today said that it’s my own fault that my life is not what I want, what can I do about the fact that these are the circumstances, it’s as if I always wanted the best, but it turned out worse than ever. I want everything to be somehow different, but I don’t see a way out, there are no prerequisites. I just don’t want to live anymore, I feel that all my attempts to change something are fruitless. and then what, poverty, complete uselessness to anyone and a cheap coffin. this is all
Support the site:

Alexandra, age: 40 / 01/13/2013

Responses:

Alexandra, write what went wrong, why you call yourself that. Other people are fine, God will be their judge, but why are you spreading rot on yourself? As if there are people in the world who succeed in everything as they planned. Well, that's all. And always. Wizards are simple. They rule the whole world... Come on, some kind of nonsense... If you yourself, Alexandra, know that you wanted something, did everything in your power - and this something did not happen due to circumstances beyond your control - why are you scolding yourself? You are not omnipotent, you are not the Lord God. You can’t scold yourself for the way the world works, where we depend on a lot of different things...

Nelly, age: ** / 01/14/2013

You know, Alexandra, I don’t like to be a hypocrite and I don’t want to look like that blind man who leads the blind. It's clear from the letter that you
in despair, but we must not be afraid to somehow admit mistakes, we are all not saints. You know, the mistake of me and those around me is often that we spend our energy in the wrong places. Well, look, you are doing soul-searching, maybe there are problems in the past, but there is no need to pick an abscess, we live now and do something now. Happiness is it not in oboak, but often next to us.
Strength must be spent on spiritual life, not only on material life, there will be peace in the soul and it will become easier in the family, at work and man
a good one will appear. We are men looking for a positive, cheerful woman, so don’t be upset, do something little by little

Mikhail, age: 27 / 01/14/2013

Sasha, are you sure that most people’s lives turn out exactly the way they would like? But they don’t want to die.
You still haven’t explained why exactly life isn’t turning out the way you wanted. After all, you can try to change some things in life. Your life is in your hands. For example, my life, my personal life, also didn’t work out for a long time. But I didn’t give up and looked for my destiny, mainly through the Internet, because in my opinion it’s convenient. It took me about 6 years to search, but ultimately I found my destiny there. Do you know how many times I wanted to give up and stopped believing that I would have a family, but I didn’t give up and got what I wanted. As they say, the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Don't give up, knock!

Oksana, age: 32 / 01/14/2013

Yes, it hurts and you want to die, but since you asked the question to the Universe, then be patient and you will receive an answer. I asked a question To higher powers about your purpose in life. I considered myself a complete failure, just like you. For two years I asked for an answer, I was very worried and tormented. And they gave me the answer. It turned out that I was very successful in fulfilling my purpose, although socially...there were failures. Now I am happy and calm, and material things will follow. I can’t write everything, but the topic is very interesting. Put a specific question to the Higher Powers and get ready to receive an answer. Good luck.

Tala, age: 40 / 01/14/2013

40 is a great age to start new life from scratch! Change profession, city, occupation. Buck up, darling, and go for it!

Agnia Lvovna, age: 72 / 01/14/2013

Alexandra, I apologize, maybe my story is inappropriate, it’s up to you to decide whether to read it or not. The important thing I want to advise you is in the last paragraph.

I had terrible depression, I prayed for death, everything was disgusting, there was no support, no one understood, I hated life, everything didn’t work out the way I wanted, “friends” mocked me, judged me. I went to a psychologist - 0 progress, I ran out of money for a psychologist, thank God. Because his treatment method pushed me more towards suicide - he taught me forgiveness and fought my aggression. The decision came by chance. I was in a theater once, and a thought flashed through me that I heard and knew, but this time it was as clear as ever: “All life is a Game.” I put on a mask, chose for myself the Role that I needed: a self-confident, self-sufficient person, unshakable and able to defend himself with words.” In response to all the attacks from friends and relatives that they say I have everything6 in one place, I also “hit” them in the most painful places - angry and rude, but why don’t they think that it hurts me, it hurts terribly, yes, I’m weak, Well, is this a reason to drive me crazy? You can judge. But this is my life and territory!!
There were hysterical breakdowns, the thought was to give up everything, I was sick, that I remained a failure. I performed rituals that I read on websites, threw away all old things, photographs, closed the door to my old life - I understood perfectly well that I was sick, but this is my medicine and it helped me.
In my new life: “I am confident, I can do everything, I am my own Master,” this is how I positioned myself in front of everyone. I have never judged myself for my mistakes and mistakes, I need to learn this, because it is an internal reflex - block it, block this depressing self-criticism.
I began to study the language, communicate with foreigners who study Russian, of all ages and genders, thereby improving my language skills. My social circle has changed, there are fewer acquaintances, but they were like my Mask, I fed energy from them!! None of them ever condemned me, all criticism was objective, I am grateful to them for that!! They, as it turned out, also cry, and sometimes engage in self-flagellation, not everything is as wonderful as it seems, it’s like that for everyone, YOU NEED TO BE ABLE TO PAINLESSLY perceive reality.

It was terribly difficult for me, terrible pain, mental pain - probably the worst in this world, you can’t get rid of it by drinking painkillers, it’s like “walking barefoot on hot coals.” I did everything through force and to spite everyone.
I can’t say that I’m very happy now, but this is not the state of fear, horror and hopelessness.
I’m trying to change my own consciousness, to direct everything towards the positive - it doesn’t work, Maybe you can do it!! ??
I CAN ONLY TELL YOU THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS I learned in my lesson:
Who gave them the right to JUDGE YOU? On what basis are they putting you on trial? Have they been in your shoes, have they lived your life, have they experienced your pain? Do they have a fire burning in their chests and consuming pain? This is what only “pathetic little people” do, who amuse their pride at the expense of your failures. Wouldn’t you lend a helping hand to a fallen person? or will you pass by shouting Loser?
Believe me, Suicide is an extra reason to prove that you are really a Loser, you cannot arrange your life and the most The best way drop everything and leave. Why do you need such a stigma? Most people don’t have the life they dream about, unfortunately this is how it turns out...
Alexandra, I believe, I believe madly in you, you are the only one, the way you are, you have to fight through “I don’t want”, sometimes this is a very difficult path!! But when you get through it, it’s truly a victory over yourself, over your fears: the most difficult thing that can happen in life. And you, of course, can, we can do EVERYTHING, absolutely everything!!! This is a challenge, it is given only to the strong, you just don’t know about this potential in you.
I understand that everything is difficult, I still don’t have it the way I want, there is no warmth, comfort, family - but I’m struggling, I don’t believe in myself and that it will happen (my faith died a long time ago), BUT I make every effort to defy fate and everything!!!

With all my heart I wish you success and overcome this temporary illness!!

Alex, age: 35 / 01/14/2013

What kind of pessimism though! Tail with a pistol! When we came into this world, no one promised that it would be easy and fun. In the end, everything that does not kill us makes us stronger. There is no need to frantically look for a way out of the seemingly hopeless situation, try to be inactive and go with the flow, looking closely at the circumstances and hoping for the best - and everything will eventually return to normal. A person should not seek harmony with the outside world, because the world, according to by and large, he doesn’t care, he must find harmony with himself - and then the world will not seem so hostile to him. Live your life without proving anything to anyone, you know everything you need about yourself, but what do people think about you and your life - what difference does it make to you, you can’t please people, especially relatives - after all, we are connected with them by karmic ties, and As a rule, we are given to each other for a reason - either as a reward or as punishment for the purpose of education. In general, take a simpler approach to life, there’s not much of it left for a human lifetime, so why complicate everything if the end is determined to be a “coffin”, as you say, and whether it’s cheap or expensive, won’t it matter to us?

Sometimes everything goes wrong in a woman's life...
Personal life is not going well, health leaves much to be desired, there is no job or you don’t like it at all, money is running out, constant conflicts with relatives... In general, bad luck and complete collapse, some kind of black streak and, it seems, there is no way out...

You are trying to solve a problem in one area, but another is dragging you down. For example, how to achieve success in your career when your health sometimes doesn’t even allow you to leave the house? Or how to meet your love and create a wonderful relationship when your family is constantly putting pressure on you, and your self-esteem is constantly creeping down?

There are plenty of reasons to simply fall into despair and... thereby create for yourself more more problems! The solution is to stop constantly focusing on what is and turn your attention to what you want.

As a rule, we do not allow ourselves to daydream and fly in the clouds, and if we have a lot of problems, then dreams and daydreams seem even more inappropriate. We think that the way out of problems is to fight them and win. You need to be strong, have nerves of iron... But everything is really not like that.

If your life is full of tension, fatigue and pain, this is a signal that you need to relax a long time ago and allow yourself to become happy without fighting and without trying to deserve it.

Very often, a difficult struggle with difficulties is due to the fact that a woman has been accustomed since childhood to be correct, to be an excellent student - and tries to act as circumstances require of her, and not as she herself wishes. Such women lack audacity, healthy egoism and contact with their wild and beautiful essence. They don't believe that well-being is their natural state.

We need to stop swimming against the current, stop fighting...
How to stop fighting? Stop looking at your problems.

Is your personal life not working out?
- It's probably because I'm scary or men just don't like me.

Do you often get sick and feel weak?
- I’m kind of frail: all people are like people, but I just get sick.

Can't find a suitable job?
- I'm lazy, mediocre, stupid, useless...

Or the answer to all questions could be:
- I'm just terribly unlucky!

This is all wrong! Of course, you can always find flaws in yourself, you can look for confirmation of your bad luck... But this will not lead you to where you intend to go.

Be bolder, stronger and more confident not in order to fight all this, but in order to allow yourself to enjoy life now, standing where you are now. Courage and confidence to enjoy, not to fight.

You can say:
Okay, I won't pay attention to problems anymore, I'll think about good things and try to enjoy life. But the problems still won’t go away, the pain in the body won’t go away right away, the man won’t fall from the sky, new job there won't be a knock on the door, and money won't grow on a tree...

To this I sometimes answer clients: “Hmm, why not?”

It's hard to believe that happiness will fall from the sky, although it can fall.
You need to let what you want into your life SO that it is comfortable for you.

Indeed, getting everything you wanted in one day is somehow too much... And, as a rule, no one chooses this path. More often than not, it’s more pleasant for you when everything unfolds gradually and consistently, but at the same time let it be a little “seasoned with magic,” otherwise you will again become too deeply immersed in solving problems.

If you think that everything depends only on you and your efforts, you will simply become exhausted again.

• But if you imagine that from now on you seem to be caught by a stormy current and carried towards the life that you have long dreamed of,
• if you expect a successful outcome,
• if you believe that from now on you are lucky,
• if you feel like you found a magic genie lamp or a magic wand,
• if you manage not to return again and again to unpleasant thoughts,
• if you allow yourself to think that from now on everything will work out in your favor,
• if you find the courage and audacity to say that you don’t care what people think about this,
• if you trust your body, which asks for comfort, relaxation and pleasant sensations,
• if you protect yourself from unpleasant contacts and unpleasant affairs,
• if you find the courage to refuse everyone and everything that does not bring you pleasure,
• and, finally, if you believe that your happiness was there all this time and was waiting for such a positive attitude -

then this is happiness and your dreams will quickly come into your life!

And you won’t have to wait several years or several lifetimes. Even today you can feel positive changes in your life. At first a little bit... And then it will grab you. Just don't stop. Your happiness and well-being are worth giving yourself entirely to this process.

Create your life!
The only problem is that many have forgotten that they create their own lives. What main tool creations are your thoughts, your mood, your feelings and attitude towards something.

And for many, to start a new, improved version of their life, all they need is for someone to confidently tell them: “You can do it!”

I'm telling you - you can!

There are times in life when it seems that everything is not going the way we would like... Be it serious health or financial problems, or discord in the family, conflicts with children... As L. Tolstoy once said: “Everything happy families are equally happy, but every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”

The truth is that everyone always has problems, and Happiness is not the absence of difficulties in life, but the ability to deal with them. No matter how bad or good you feel, start the day with gratitude. Look at what you ALREADY have, instead of dwelling on missed opportunities and losses.

Here are some more important reminders. Read them every time you feel like giving up:

1. Pain is part of growth.

Sometimes life closes doors because it's time to move. And this is good, because we often do not start moving unless circumstances force us. When times get tough, remind yourself that no pain comes without a purpose. Move away from what hurts you, but never forget the lesson it teaches you. Just because you are struggling doesn't mean you are failing. Every great success requires a worthy struggle to be present. Good things take time. Stay patient and confident. Everything will be alright; most likely not in a moment, but eventually everything will be...

Remember that there are two kinds of pain: pain that hurts, and pain that changes you. As you go through life, instead of resisting it, let it help you grow.

2. Everything in life is temporary.

Always when it rains you know it will end. Every time you are hurt, the wound heals. After darkness there is always light - you are reminded of this every morning, but nevertheless you often forget and believe that the night will always last. It will not happen. Nothing lasts forever.

So, if everything is good right now, enjoy it. This won't last forever. If things are bad, don't worry because it won't last forever either. That life is not easy this moment, doesn't mean you can't laugh. Just because something is bothering you doesn't mean you can't smile. Every moment gives you a new beginning and a new ending. Every second you get a second chance. You are given a chance, and you just have to take it.

3. Worrying and complaining won't change anything.

Those who complain the most achieve the least. It is always better to try to do something big and fail than to try to do nothing and succeed. Nothing is over if you lose; it's all over if you're really just complaining. If you believe in something, keep trying. Don't let the shadows of the past cloud your future. Today's complaints about yesterday will not make tomorrow brighter. Let what you know improve the way you live. Make a change and never look back.

And no matter what ultimately happens, remember that true happiness begins to arrive only when you stop complaining about your problems and start being grateful for all the problems that you don't have.

4. Your scars are symbols of your strength.

Never be ashamed of the scars life has left you. The scar means that there is no more pain and the wound has healed. This means that you have overcome the pain, learned a lesson, become stronger and have moved forward. The scar is a tattoo of triumph. Don't let your scars hold you hostage. Don't let them make you live in fear. You can't make scars disappear, but you can change the way you see them. You may begin to view your scars as a sign of strength.

Ryumi once said: “The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” Nothing could be closer to the truth. From suffering came the most strong souls; the most influential people in this big world marked with scars. Look at your scars as a slogan: “YES! I DID IT! I survived and I have the scars to prove it! And now I have a chance to become even stronger.”

5. Every little struggle is a step forward.

In life, patience is not about waiting; it is in the ability to preserve good mood, working hard towards your dreams, in the knowledge that the work is worth it. So if you're going to try it, go all the way. Otherwise there is no point in starting. This could mean a loss of stability and comfort for a while, and perhaps even your sanity. This may mean not eating what you used to or not sleeping as much as you used to for weeks on end. This may mean changing your comfort zone. This may mean sacrificing relationships and everything you know. This may mean the appearance of ridicule. This may mean time that you will spend alone. Solitude, however, is a gift that makes many things possible. It gives you the space you need. Everything else is a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to achieve your goal.

And if you want it, you will do it, despite failures and disagreements. And every step you take you will feel better than you can imagine. You will understand that struggle is not an obstacle on the way, it is the path. And it's worth it. So if you're going to try it, go all the way. There is no better feeling in the world... there is no better feeling than knowing what it means to be ALIVE.

6. Other people's negativity is not your problem.

Be confident when bad things surround you. Smile when others try to defeat you. This - easy way support your own enthusiasm. When other people talk bad about you, continue to be yourself. Never let someone else's talk change the person you are. You can't take things too personally, even if it seems personal. Don't think that people do things because of you. They do things because of themselves.

First of all, never change to impress someone who says you are not good enough. Change if it makes you better and leads you to a brighter future. People will talk no matter what you do or how well you do it. Worry about yourself before you worry about what others think. If you believe in something, don't be afraid to fight for it. Great strength comes from overcoming the impossible.

All jokes aside, you only have one life. So do what makes you happy and be with someone who makes you smile.

7. What is meant to be will eventually BE.

True strength comes when you, instead of screaming and complaining, choose to smile and appreciate your life. There are blessings hidden in every struggle you face, but you must be willing to open your heart and mind to see them. You can't make things happen. You can only try. At some point you have to let go and allow what is meant to happen.

Love your life, trust your intuition, take risks, lose and find happiness, learn through experience. It's a long trip. You must stop worrying, questioning and doubting at any moment. Laugh, live in every moment and enjoy your life. You may not know exactly where you intended to go, but you will eventually arrive where you need to be.

8. The best thing you can do is keep moving.

Don't be afraid to get angry. Don't be afraid to love again. Don't let the cracks in your heart turn into scars. Understand that strength increases every day. Understand that courage is beautiful. Find in your heart what makes others smile. Remember that you don't need many people in your life, so don't strive to have more "friends." Be strong when things get tough. Remember that the universe always does what is right. Admit when you are wrong and learn from it. Always look back and see what you have achieved and be proud of yourself. Don't change for anyone if you don't want to. Do more. Write stories. Take photos. Be aware of the moments and ways in which your loved ones look at you.

Just keep being YOU. Keep growing. Keep moving.