Is there a difference between a dream and a goal? According to psychologists, yes, and dramatically so. We strive for a goal, take certain steps to achieve it, make plans, analyze our mistakes. But at the same time, all of the above actions can be performed by us without connecting emotions. A dream, on the contrary, is a kind of romantic vision of the future, which does not require even a small effort on our part.
For example, a young man sees himself as a great professional in his dreams, but instead of studying he plays computer games. Or a girl imagines herself losing several sizes, lounging on the sofa with a plate of buns. However, if she signs up for a consultation with a nutritionist and starts going to the gym, then her dream will turn into a goal. So, these two concepts are different, but they are not mutually exclusive. Often a goal follows from a dream and becomes part of it. It happens that youthful dreams become life goals, or, conversely, become an illusion.
In order to avoid the latter, it is necessary to soberly assess how feasible your cherished desire is, calculate the time for its implementation, draw up an action plan, taking into account possible obstacles, and then persistently move forward. And most importantly, remember that constant movement, and not passive waiting, is the key to future success. But doesn’t it happen that there is movement, but the goal is not achieved? It happens, and there are very specific reasons for this.
The first one– adherence to traditions, mainly family ones. Suppose a young man grew up in a house where the dominant attitude was: work a lot - get little. Therefore, even having achieved material wealth, he will not receive satisfaction and will feel like a stranger among those who grew up in wealthy families. Thus, family tradition impart material well-being a negative connotation will become a psychological obstacle for him.
What to do? First, recognize that children are not obligated to copy the lives of their parents; they may have completely different goals. Secondly, overcome the fear of being rejected by your new environment. Psychologists have noticed that those who more easily experience the feeling of awkwardness from making a mistake and are not afraid of being rejected in a new social environment achieve success faster.
Another obstacle– regret about missed opportunities. Sometimes, when a goal is not realized, we think that if we had taken a different path, everything would have turned out differently. This clean water an illusion that needs to be gotten rid of. A person tends to idealize the past if he is dissatisfied with the current result. That's why unused opportunities seem like missed opportunities to him. However, psychologists believe that at a certain point in time we do the only possible thing we are capable of.
Therefore, there is no point in regretting the past. Firstly, returning to a lived moment is unrealistic, and secondly, no one can say with certainty how events would have developed if we had acted differently, perhaps everything would have turned out even worse. But it’s worth analyzing why we didn’t use another option, in order to implement it another time, if similar situation will happen again. True, there is also no guarantee that this opportunity will definitely lead to success.
Lack of persistence is another common obstacle that often prevents us from achieving our goals. It happens that we give up without a fight after the slightest obstacle, when we need to make another attempt, and if necessary, a third and fifth. You cannot give up on your goal easily. As psychologists aptly remark, life is not a souvenir shop where, upon request, we are given a gift in a sparkling wrapper. However, perseverance is not a mania, and if a hundred attempts did not produce results, it is hardly worth trying the hundred and first.
If on the way to your goal you have to constantly overcome obstacles, it means that either the goal was chosen by someone else, or you are going to the goal through someone else’s door. The only thing in life that can be considered important is determining Your goal and door. You can spend your whole life striving for other people's goals and achieve nothing. There is nothing sadder than admitting that all your efforts were wasted and life was not a success.
The stereotype of forced necessity has been brought to such an absurdity that one might think that life is a term that everyone must serve, or a labor service that everyone must fulfill. A person becomes so accustomed to necessity that the true inclinations of the soul are pushed into the farthest corner of consciousness until better times. But life ends, and better times they never come. Happiness is always looming somewhere in the future. A false stereotype states: for this future to come, it must be conquered, earned, achieved. People often give up what they love for financial reasons. Businesses are divided into hobbies and work itself, which should generate income. Along with setting false goals, forced necessity is another method of pendulums in their attempts to lead a person away from his path.
Stereotype of forced necessity
In fact, you can make good money even from a hobby if that is your goal. If you are forced to give up something you love simply because it does not generate income, then you should clearly determine whether this activity is relevant to your goal. Will your favorite activity turn your life into a holiday or not?
If this business cannot be attributed to your goal, then it is impossible to say for sure whether it will bring you income or not. But if you are sure that this is your goal, then it will undoubtedly bring all the attributes of comfort into your life. When the target matches the door, the person does not need to worry about material wealth, he will have everything if he wants it.
However, the false stereotype of forced necessity does not allow a person to fully devote himself to his goal. This is confirmed by many examples. Such an eccentric lives, walks like everyone else necessary work, and in free time creates or invents something. It never occurs to him that his creations can be sold at a high price.
He lives in poverty, convinced that he has to work hard for a piece of bread. And his hobby is “for the soul.” Do you understand what's happening? A person spends most of his life as a laborer for some guy - they say this is necessary to maintain existence. And the soul receives the crumbs left over from the main working hours. So for whom does a person live? For that uncle?
If your goal matches your door, you will become rich from your hobby. Achieving your goal will attract the fulfillment of all other desires, and the results will exceed all expectations. You can be sure that in this world everything that is made with soul is very expensive.
The products of pure reason, on the contrary, are not highly valued. As you know, true masterpieces are born in the unity of soul and mind. On the way to your goal, you will create your masterpieces if you do not allow the pendulums to lead you astray. In this case, everything is simple: you just need to calmly follow your path and not succumb to the tricks of pendulums. Sooner or later, you will achieve great success.
The situation is somewhat more complicated if the goal and the door do not coincide. Although, before you come to such a conclusion, think very carefully. Your goal can't make your life too difficult. On the contrary, by choosing your goal, you will greatly simplify your life and get rid of a lot of problems.
Don't rush into choosing a door. If you have the determination to have it, the door will be found. If you don’t clearly understand where your door is, work with slides and expand your comfort zone. Drop the importance, give up the desire to achieve the goal. Once you allow yourself to have, outer intention will present you with an appropriate option.
Your door is the path that will lead to your goal. Once you have determined your goal, ask yourself: how can this goal be achieved? Outer intention will sooner or later reveal various possibilities to you. Your task is to find your door among them. Consider all possible options. Each option must be subjected to a state of mental comfort test. Here you can be guided by the same principles as when choosing a goal.
Let's say your goal implies that you are a well-to-do person. Then you need to decide what will allow you to become wealthy. After all, money comes not just to a person, but to what he is. It could be: a show business star, a major industrialist, a financier, an outstanding specialist, an heir, and finally.
So what do you want to become? You need to find exactly your path to wealth - what your heart lies in. What it means, you need to ask the soul, not the mind. The mind is a product of society. And society rests on pendulums. Society says: “Become a celebrity, a politician, rich - it’s prestigious.” But since your personal happiness is of no interest to the pendulum, it will not help you determine exactly your niche in this life.
Reason and friends tell you what to look for high paying job, for example, a lawyer. Everyone tells you that becoming a qualified lawyer will make you a ton of money. You really want to earn a lot of money, but this door may be foreign to you. Through this door you will get to the wrong place.
If your goal is chosen correctly, then your door will open opportunities that you never dreamed of. Let's say your requests are your house, car, good salary. When you enter Your door, you will receive so much that your previous requests will seem simply ridiculous to you. But to do this, you must not make a mistake in choosing Your door.
Take your time and take your time to choose. You will waste a lot more time and effort if you rush and make the wrong choice. It can take months to identify the target and the door. During this time, you will need to observe a kind of “fast of impeccability” - if possible, strictly follow the basic principles of Transurfing. You are already familiar with them.
First of all, it is awareness. You must be aware of the motives for your actions. Do you act consciously, understanding the rules of the game, or do you weakly obey the pendulum?
Monitor the level of internal and external importance. Thinking about your goal and the door as if you already have one. There is no prestige, inaccessibility or necessity. Drop all importance. What you have is ordinary for you.
Give up the desire to achieve your goal. If it works out, it’s good, but if it doesn’t work out, it means it’s not yours, and there’s nothing to grieve about. If you don't believe that you have the goal in your pocket, then accept defeat in advance. Allow yourself to make mistakes. Make room in your life for failure, let it be supervised.
Find replacement insurance for this door. Don’t immediately give up on your old door, don’t burn bridges behind you, act carefully. Don't bet everything on one card. Leave yourself some escape routes.
Don't stop replaying the slide of your goal in your thoughts. Thus, you expand your comfort zone and tune in to the frequency of the target line. External intention itself will give you the necessary information.
In order not to miss this information, insert into your head a slide of searching for your goal and your door. Pass all data from the outside world through this slide. Evaluate whether it suits you or not. Listen to the rustling of the morning stars, not your mind. Keep track not of what you think about it, but of what oppresses or inspires you. Pay attention to the attitude of the soul to any information. At a certain moment she will perk up and exclaim: “This is exactly what you need!”
Again, take your time. Expand your comfort zone and tune your thoughts to the goal line until your goal and door form into a clear concept. You must come to a clear conclusion: “Yes, I want this, and this will turn my life into a holiday.” Your soul sings, and your mind rubs its hands in satisfaction.
If your soul is already singing, but your mind still doubts, expand your comfort zone again. This will allow you to crack the disturbing false stereotype of inaccessibility and unreality. Do you know why the door seems impenetrable? Because it is locked into the false stereotype of unavailability that sits in your mind. When you break the pattern, the door will open.
I'm not asking you to believe me, or yourself, or anyone else. You will never make the mind believe. The mind unconditionally accepts only facts. So, for the door to become real for the mind, you must move to the target line of life. And this can only be done using a target slide.
At the beginning of your line, the goal is still ahead, but the ways to achieve it are already really visible to the mind. Convincing yourself and fighting the stereotype is useless. This is not what breaking a stereotype is all about. It will collapse on its own when outer intention shows you new opportunities on the target line. Therefore, I draw your attention: do not try to convince yourself and do not fight the stereotype. All you need to do is systematically turn the target slide in your mind. These are not empty speculative exercises, but concrete movement towards the goal.
Don't forget that material realization is inert, and external intention cannot fulfill your order instantly. You will need patience. And if you don’t have enough patience, it means you passionately desire to achieve your goal as quickly as possible. Then start over and reduce the importance. You desire, which means you doubt the reality of achievement. Again, expand your comfort zone until you see real prospects opening up.
Pendulums can disguise your door under a veil of false insignificance and low value. Everything that you can do easily, naturally, and willingly has meaning and value. You have not a single insignificant virtue. Any stupidity that is characteristic of you, but within the framework of stereotypes has no value, can serve as the key to your door. Try to project your characteristic “frivolous” quality onto serious doors.
For example, if you have a reputation for being a bit of a joke, then maybe you could be a great comedian. If everyone tells you that you are of no use, you only know how to dress up and preen yourself, then maybe your door leads to the profession of a top model, makeup artist, or fashion designer.
If you are annoyed by advertising, and you like to grumble that everything is being done wrong, and in your opinion, advertising should be presented in a completely different way, then maybe this is not just your dissatisfaction, but a hidden desire to show your abilities in this area.
These are specific examples. Your personal “worthless” quality may manifest itself in completely unexpected ways. You will discover this if you turn away from the pendulums and turn to your soul. Think about it: if you really do your stupid actions naturally and willingly, then it must have some meaning.
All of the above applies to the process of choosing your door. But let’s say you are already on the way to your chosen goal. Then there is one way to determine whether it is your door or someone else’s. If on the way to your goal you get tired, lose energy, and become exhausted, then this is not your door. On the contrary, if you are inspired when you are doing something that brings you closer to your goal, you can safely consider this activity Your door.
There is one more way to distinguish your door from someone else’s. Someone else's door can pretend to be yours, it seems to open in front of you, but at the most decisive moment it slams in your face. It turns out that on the way through someone else's door, everything seems to be going fine, but ultimately, in the most important way, you fail.
If this has happened to you, it means you walked through someone else's door. This reveals the insidiousness of pendulums, who deliberately open public doors in order to lure more adherents there.
As a rule, no one crowds near your doors. But even if you meet many people who want to pass through your door, everyone immediately makes way and you pass freely. Public doors are open to everyone, but few pass through them.
Remember again how pendulums create myths about the successful careers of stars and try to subject everyone to the rule “do as I do.” People, carried away by a mirage, all burst together at the same door, while their own doors standing next to each other completely free.
However, your door may also close in front of you if you have grossly violated the law of balance. For example, your goal is too important to you, and everything is at stake. This door can be opened again if the importance is reduced. published
P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness, we are changing the world together! © econet
The brain is a powerful weapon. Knowing how to manage it can solve a wide range of problems. The management process consists of two elements: awareness and involvement.
Awareness- this is an understanding of what a barrier is, what causes it, how it prevents the achievement of a goal and how to deal with it.
Engagement is taking the steps you deem necessary to develop new approaches to thinking and acting, and the ability to achieve any given task.
Failures in thinking form barriers, and as a result we slow down, begin to go with the flow and even retreat. These barriers turn motivation into a stop, performance into an imitation of activity, and dreams into green melancholy. Our actions become aimless, ineffective and do not lead to success.
Now let's look at five hidden brain barriers and strategies for overcoming them.
Barrier 1: self-doubt
The monster is within us. It goes by many names: lack of confidence, insecurity, shyness, low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, and so on. When it is not clear what to do, it becomes scary. Fear blocks action and instills a feeling of vulnerability. A person begins to doubt his own abilities, intelligence, strength, and success. Attention switches from what needs to be done to self-defense, and this leads to a dead end. You avoid trying new things, socializing, being the center of attention, and changing your life. There is nothing more pathetic than living in constant fear.
Solution
Doubt turns on when the brain begins to react to anxiety, although there is no real danger. To avoid this, you need to train your brain to suppress unnecessary fears. After repeated exposure to an unusual task, the brain stops overreacting and gets used to it.
Examine what you are afraid of. A familiar demon is better than a stranger.
Self-doubt is often associated with a lack of information. Facts and data switch the brain from the primitive four-phase “freeze-flight-fight-surrender” pattern to a more complex and less emotional one, so it’s harder for fear to overwhelm you.
In his book “Geniuses and Outsiders. Why is it everything for some and nothing for others? Malcolm Gladwell writes that success comes from continued practice and that the best specialists have thousands of hours of experience in their field. Moral: pick up what you don't know how to do and do it again and again.
Barrier 2: procrastination
If there is a crime of which no, no, and every person is guilty, then this is postponing things for later. But the main ingredient for success is action. Without it you cannot achieve what you want. Since procrastination causes delays, giving in to it is the same as doing nothing at all.
Procrastination indefinitely leads to unpredictable consequences.
For life goals - career growth, starting a business, financial independence, self-realization - there is no set date. There are no deadlines - there are no consequences for their failure. It also means deferred action. And if there is no action, there are no results. Vicious circle. Stop putting off the fight against procrastination!
Solution
Sometimes the connection between what you want and what needs to be done to achieve it is unclear. When what needs to be done seems unrelated to your goals, the task is assigned a low level of importance and is put off. To clear the picture and start moving towards your goal, consider a few points.
What skills do you need? And do you need to perform this task yourself? Can I delegate it or not do it at all? If you still need to do it, what are the options for solving the problem?
Brainstorm. Visualize the result as vividly as possible. Desire getting what you have in mind will not let you go astray. Determine in advance how many resources you have and how much more you will need. Do at least a little a day. A little is a lot.
Barrier 3: Multitasking
For many years it was believed that the ability to do several things at once is an indispensable attribute of any self-respecting successful person. Later serious side effects: it turned out that it prevents you from concentrating and finishing what you started, causes anxiety and fatigue, and a constant feeling of being in a hurry.
It's time to bust the myth of multitasking. This is the inability to concentrate on one thing. These are absent-mindedness, overload and problems with determining priorities at a particular moment.
Multitasking is like living inside parentheses: you have to constantly start and finish things, at some point the threads of events intertwine and the person gets confused. This resembles the example solution:
(14 + (4 × 5 (6 + 1 – 9)) / (6 + 72 / (3 × 3) + 7 + (9 – 4) / 5 × (3 + (8 / 4) / 5))) ) = x
The more you get involved in multitasking, the more unclosed parentheses remain, and their number is constantly growing.
Solution
Most researchers identify four main types of attention control.
- Focus: turn on the flashlight. A person sees the situation and chooses what to pay attention to. It's like in dark room turn on the flashlight, shine it in front of you and see the situation.
- Hold: Don't let the light go out. Attention retention is the ability to concentrate on something for a long time.
- Selecting and Ignoring: Keep the light at one point. This is the ability to concentrate on one thing and not pay attention to distractions.
- Switching, or alternating attention: move from one important task to another, stop in the process, redirect attention to something else, and then return to the postponed task and start from where you left off.
In a TED talk in 2012, Paolo Cardini proposed a great antidote to multitasking: single-tasking. This is a skill worth developing! Remember your goal. Ask yourself what you need to do at this moment, and turn on single-tasking mode!
Barrier 4: Inflexibility
There is a big difference between a firm position and unnecessary persistence. Following a plan is persistence. Refusing to correct it in changed circumstances is inflexibility. Standing up for being right is a virtue. Believing in your own infallibility is blindness.
The primary action associated with inflexibility is resistance. Resistance to change, resistance to the new, resistance to progress. A person continues to act and think as before, although the conditions have changed and the previous methods no longer work. He stops responding to changes, he creative thinking and ability fade away.
Solution
The opposite of inflexibility is creativity. Here's a simple mental flexibility test. Take a piece of paper or your phone and in a few minutes write down all the possible uses for socks. How many ways have you come up with? How similar are your examples to each other? How thoughtful are the answers? Was it difficult to complete the task?
Take some pressing problem: it could be an unmade decision, a protracted situation, an unnerving event - anything that requires action. Lock it in. Now get started brainstorming: write down as much as possible possible options solutions, as many as you can think of. Observe two principles: associations are spontaneous and do not need to be evaluated.
Consciously making adjustments to your routine and habits is a surefire way to train your brain to accept change.
Barrier 5: perfectionism
Perfectionism is the least likely problem. Striving for something seems necessary and sublime. But "ideal" and " highest level“It is very difficult to formulate and measure, so the goal of a perfectionist is elusive and abstract. Anything other than the ideal is unacceptable to him. If something doesn't meet the criteria, it needs to be rejected, replaced, or remade. However, in this case the work will never end. You can always correct, change and improve something - and still this will not be enough, because the ideal is unattainable.
Solution
Perfectionism is the inability to prioritize. The secondary becomes primary. The background comes to the foreground. Wearing the right clothes is more important than enjoying the evening, and more attention is paid to serving than preparing dinner. Before you start working on a project, ask yourself: “What am I striving for at this moment?” State a simple and direct goal, such as “cook dinner” or “make a presentation for work.” Set strict limits. If you become obsessive and preoccupied with small things, stop and remind yourself of your goal.
The path to the goal is not easy, like any path that leads upward. It is almost inevitable that we will face many difficulties on the way up. It can be both external circumstances and our internal state. But the main thing in this path is not the goal itself, but what we have to become in order to achieve it.
If you have already decided what your goal will be, then the first thing you should understand is that difficulties are good. Difficulties are exactly what separates us from the goal, and since they exist, it means we are moving.
Let's look at the path to the goal and those emotional states, through which we will go until we achieve success.
1. Invitation
The first thing that appears on the way to a goal is an invitation to start. This is something that interested us. Something we wanted to make a part of our lives. But this is not just a desire, but also a path, the first outlines of which have appeared before us.
At this stage we decide to go forward or not to go forward. Everything seems simple and clear, and the goal is easily achievable.
2. Enthusiasm
A person begins to make his first efforts, he himself is delighted that he has begun the journey of his dream. The feeling at this stage is complete satisfaction that a start has been made. And once it has been established, then success is almost in your hands!
3. Skin of an unkilled bear
Enthusiasm reaches its peak. In the imagination, a person has already achieved everything he dreamed of. Mentally, he is already beginning to think about how he will heal now! But unfortunately, a person forgets that he has taken only a few small steps, and there are thousands of them ahead.
Of course, the most important thing is to start, but that's not all.
4. First difficulties
The first difficulties appear, which slightly cool a person’s ardor. The man begins to stumble. Previously, he was walking along the asphalt road, but now he left it. There is a lack of experience and knowledge.
5. It's not that simple
The understanding comes that everything is not so simple. A person's enthusiasm receives the first big blow. The path to the goal is no longer saturated with such euphoria. Irritation is growing.
At this stage, many people quit, only to receive an invitation again after a while. Desire never goes away!
6. Persistence
If a person does not quit, then he tries to find some kind of support to continue, but the enthusiasm is no longer the same. And a person finds support in perseverance. “I have decided and will move further along this path!” Oddly enough, it helps and confidence gradually begins to return.
7. Doubt in the case
A person learns more and more about his dream. It is already acquiring realistic outlines, it is already noticeable and negative traits. Maybe this goal is not worth all these sacrifices? Maybe it's time to give it all up?
At this stage, a certain number of people are eliminated. But what makes those who remain move forward? Again, persistence. “If this goal is worthless, then what is worth it?”
8. Self-doubt
Difficulties grow and then a person thinks that maybe it’s about him and not about the goal? Maybe he is not worthy of this goal? This caustic thought weeds out a lot of people.
But what is holding the rest back? And the rest spit on doubts. Persistence saves them. They no longer do it for themselves, they already have a mission. What does it matter whether a person is worthy? The point is the main thing.
9. Lack of results
The next obstacle is the lack of visible results. A lot of effort has already been put in, but there is still no return. The goal still seems far away. Of course, this is an illusion; in fact, the goal is approaching.
It can be compared to a journey. When half the journey has already been completed, but the person is not yet at his destination and this point is not even visible on the horizon. It may seem like everything is in vain! But that's not true. The result will not be visible for a long time, but this does not mean that the person is on the wrong path. The critical point has simply not yet been passed.
10. Pride in what you have done
It is pride in what one has done that saves a person. Yes, the result is not yet visible, but the amount of work is amazing. And this, together with perseverance, gives strength to move on. It's like a marathon. When a person has already run out of strength (stages 7 and 8) and the only thing that makes him run is persistence. Suddenly, it becomes a little easier and a second wind opens.
I would like to note that stages 7-10 can be repeated several times, depending on the complexity of the goal. And all along the way there will be people who dissuade you, who say that nothing will work out.
11. Faith
It's darkest before dawn. Resistance is strongest when we are about to break through circumstances. At this stage, perseverance already develops into faith, when everyone around already has doubts. This is the moment of hesitation when 99% of the work has already been done. But the resistance and uncertainty are such that you want to give up.
12. Success
Success finally comes. All the work that a person has put into achieving a goal begins to bear fruit.
But the main value here is not in achieving the goal, but in the fact that the path itself has changed a person, giving him the experience of overcoming that will allow him to win in the future.
All obstacles are in our heads. It is because of them that we do not keep New Year's resolutions and do not complete our plans. Neuropsychologist Theo Tsaousidis, in his book The Obstacled Brain, talks about the hidden barriers that prevent us from achieving our goals and gives fifty recommendations on how to get around them.
The brain is a powerful weapon. Knowing how to manage it can solve a wide range of problems. The management process consists of two elements: awareness and involvement.
- Awareness- this is an understanding of what a barrier is, what causes it, how it prevents the achievement of a goal and how to deal with it.
- Engagement is taking the steps you deem necessary to develop new approaches to thinking and acting, and the ability to achieve any given task.
Failures in thinking form barriers, and as a result we slow down, begin to go with the flow and even retreat. These barriers turn motivation into stagnation, performance into imitation of activity, and dreams into green melancholy. Our actions become aimless, ineffective and do not lead to success.
Now let's look at 5 hidden brain barriers and strategies for overcoming them.
Barrier 1: Self-doubt
The monster is within us. It goes by many names: lack of confidence, insecurity, shyness, low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, and so on. When it is unclear what to do, it becomes scary. Fear blocks action and instills a feeling of vulnerability. A person begins to doubt his own abilities, intelligence, strength, and success. Attention switches from what needs to be done to self-defense, and this leads to a dead end. You avoid trying new things, socializing, being the center of attention, and changing your life. There is nothing more pathetic than living in constant fear.
Solution
Doubt turns on when the brain begins to react to anxiety, although there is no real danger. To avoid this, you need to train your brain to suppress unnecessary fears. After repeated exposure to an unusual task, the brain stops overreacting and gets used to it. Examine what you are afraid of. A familiar demon is better than a stranger. Self-doubt is often associated with a lack of information. Facts and data switch the brain from the primitive four-phase freeze-flight-fight-surrender pattern to a more complex and less emotional one, making it harder for fear to overwhelm you.
Solution
Sometimes the connection between what you want and what needs to be done to achieve it is unclear. When what needs to be done seems unrelated to your goals, the task is assigned a low level of importance and is put off. To clear the picture and start moving towards your goal, consider a few points.
What skills do you need? And do you need to perform this task yourself? Can I delegate it or not do it at all? If you still need to do it, what are the options for solving the problem? Conduct Draw in your imagination the result as vividly as possible. A strong desire to get what you have in mind will not let you go astray. Determine in advance how many resources you have and how much more you will need. Do at least a little a day. A little is a lot.
Barrier 3: Multitasking
For many years, it was believed that the ability to do many things at once is an indispensable attribute of any self-respecting successful person. Later, serious side effects appeared: it turned out that multitasking makes it difficult to concentrate and finish what you started, causes anxiety and fatigue, and a constant feeling of being in a hurry. It's time to bust the myth of multitasking. This is the inability to concentrate on one thing. These are absent-mindedness, overload and problems with determining priorities at a particular moment.
Multitasking is like living inside parentheses: you have to constantly start and finish things, at some point the threads of events intertwine and the person gets confused. This resembles the example solution:
(14 + (4 × 5 (6 + 1 - 9)) / (6 +72/(3×3)+7+(9-4)/5 × (3 + (8 / 4) / 5))) ) = x
The more you get involved in multitasking, the more unclosed parentheses remain, and their number is constantly growing.
Solution
Most researchers identify four main types of attention control.
- Focus: turn on the flashlight. A person sees the situation and chooses what to pay attention to. It's like turning on a flashlight in a dark room, shining it in front of you and seeing the situation.
- Hold: Don't let the light go out. Attention retention is the ability to concentrate on something for a long time.
- Selecting and Ignoring: Keep the light at one point. This is the ability to concentrate on one thing and not pay attention to distractions.
- Switching, or alternating attention: move from one important task to another, stop in the process of doing it, redirect attention to something else, and then return to the postponed task and start from where you left off.
Solution
The opposite of inflexibility is . Here's a simple mental flexibility test. Take a piece of paper or your phone and in a few minutes write down all the possible uses for socks. How many ways have you come up with? How similar are your examples to each other? How thoughtful are the answers? Was it difficult to complete the task?
Take some pressing problem: it could be an unmade decision, a protracted situation, an unnerving event - anything that requires action. Lock it in. Now start brainstorming: write down as many possible solutions as possible - as many as you can think of. Observe two principles: associations are spontaneous and do not need to be evaluated.
Consciously making adjustments to your routine and habits is a surefire way to train your brain to accept change.
Barrier 5: Perfectionism
Solution
Perfectionism is the inability to prioritize. The secondary becomes primary. The background comes to the foreground. Wearing the right clothes is more important than enjoying the evening, and more attention is paid to serving than preparing dinner. Before you start working on a project, ask yourself: “What am I striving for at this moment?” - formulate a simple one such as “cook dinner” or “make a presentation for work.” Set strict limits. If you become obsessive and preoccupied with small things, stop and remind yourself of your goal.
