Telegony is a popular nationalist horror story for young girls. However, sometimes adults believe in it. This theory is as follows: telegony states that a woman’s offspring are influenced by all her previous sexual partners. And especially the first man. This is reflected in the appearance and character of children. In short, not like his mother or his father, but like a passing young man.
This is stated on the basis of two or three examples from two centuries ago. Something similar happened to the horse, dogs and pigeons.
Russian priest Orthodox Church O. Nikolai (Moscow courtyard of the Valaam Monastery) argues:
“It is difficult for me to comment on the phenomenon of telegony from a biological point of view, but it seems strange that single observations obtained on livestock are automatically transferred to humans. Man is created in the image and likeness of God. Moreover, if telegony existed among people, it could also deny the sacraments of the Church! How would the birth of a “telegonic” child be explained by a woman who sinned, but repented and received remission of sins? Archpriest V.V. Zenkovsky said: “In Christianity there is one important revelation about man - about the healing significance of confession, in which our sins are forgiven. Mistakes made in youth, often carelessly, do not remain a heavy burden for a person. And we must recognize the deeply harmful misconception that there is no forgiveness for sins committed.”
In addition, if the phenomenon of telegony existed, it would deny the possibility of having their own children to people who married widows. And in the First Epistle to Timothy of the Holy Apostle Paul it is said: “So that young widows marry and give birth to children...”.
Not all colleagues agree with him. The Russian Orthodox Church does not officially recognize telegony. But there are priests to whom it seems reliable.
So Archpriest Nikolai Golovkin reflects: “From a spiritual point of view, telegony is explained very simply: the soul influences the body. “Genes” are emotions, impressions of the mother’s soul towards the child conceived in her: if a mother thinks about something, it will definitely affect the children, and they will definitely be born similar to the one she fell in love with for the first time, because this feeling is very strong , almost unforgettable.
Saint Ambrose of Milan called it “the gift of the first marriage” from God. It occurs even in the absence of physical intimacy, which is why girls used to be hidden in towers. And now girls see everything... St. John Chrysostom wrote: “How can someone whose conscience is burned be a virgin?.. You haven’t gotten married? But that’s not virginity yet.”
First love and burning of conscience are not synonymous. It turns out that even if the girl did not sleep with anyone, but loved the guy, telegony is already looming on the horizon. It's time to lock high school girls in prisons.
Telegony is loved by pagans and their magicians, who offer to save women from the consequences of this phenomenon. magical rituals for money. This phenomenon is associated with energy, aura and other mysticism. And the ladies run to the Magi for salvation from telegony.
On the one hand, the Christian Church calls on girls to remain chaste until legal marriage. On the other hand, a fantastic theory is of no help to this, and by appealing to it, you can make the same girls laugh if they are more or less educated. Are there not enough sound arguments and quotes from the holy fathers to promote chastity?
Do you believe in telegony?
Is it possible to achieve true chastity outside the Church?
Chastity, in the highest sense of the word, is recognized in Christianity as one of the most important personal virtues. As the name itself suggests, chastity is associated with internal integrity, wholeness. What kind of integrity is this, what does it consist of?
As is known, the newly created man, before he dared to sin, did not experience the slightest internal contradictions in his soul. All his spiritual forces acted harmoniously and harmoniously, the flesh was completely and non-violently subordinate to the soul. While in this state, man lived and acted in accordance with his nature, enjoying the natural joy of knowledge of God and communion with God.
The fact that chastity is achieved only through the acquisition of righteousness was announced to man back in the days Old Testament(). But the Old Testament did not possess the fullness of grace-filled saving means with which the Church of Christ is endowed, and, of course, the righteousness of the Old Testament man differed from the righteousness characteristic of Christian saints.
Righteousness as a standard of life, and therefore the (genuine) chastity associated with it, are achievable only in Christ. The Lord Himself spoke well about this: “ you can't do anything without Me» ().
Don't be afraid to push the groom away with severity. Many men believe that first they need to live in the so-called. “civil marriage”, and then get married. True, things often don’t come to marriage. Starting a relationship with carnal intimacy is wrong. There is a certain sequence in the development of relations between husband and wife: first - friendship, understanding, recognition of this person. After all, you live with this person, talk, share impressions, look at the world together, raise children, help each other, experience sorrows, illnesses, difficulties - this is the most important thing and this is exactly what you need to prepare for!
You are not looking for a “partner”, but a life partner, the father of your children. Don’t be afraid to tell him completely clearly and definitely that a close relationship is impossible for you before marriage. This is a good test of how willing a person is to respect your opinion and meet you halfway. You need to choose a person who knows how to keep his desires in check, otherwise later they can simply get out of control and everything can end in tragedy. If you start building relationships on carnal needs, this will inevitably distort the consciousness of your choice - your love, enthusiasm, passion, dependence on the person you like will interfere. And you will not be able to evaluate it soberly.
Bishop Panteleimon (Shatov)
The devil is weaker than God, but his tactics are to crush, crush internal state person. Therefore, if you read a prayer, enclose your mind in the words of the prayer, and do not get distracted, do not wander in your thoughts. It’s the same in the world: if you listen to a lecture, listen, and don’t dream about more pleasant things. Any negligence, looseness - both in work and in clothing - is a derogation of the spiritual essence. The virtue of chastity, which is highly valued in the Church, is not so much the preservation of maiden purity or youthful freshness - it is precisely purposefulness, purposefulness, and integrity of the individual. A chaste person does not exchange himself for tinsel.
What are the means for spiritual ascent? There are many means, but the meaning is the same - overcoming “pluralism”. Our life is diverse: you do one thing, think another, answer a third. To be perfect in all areas of activity is the lot of a few. Therefore, a person who concentrates his strength in one direction achieves more. Integrity and concentration of internal efforts are very important.
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Today, the most difficult thing for a parent is to teach chastity. After all, even this word itself has dropped out of the school vocabulary: we know what sex education is, gender, but “” - as a concept and as a phenomenon - is not designated for modern teenager. We talk about nurturing a chaste feeling in children with Academician of the Russian Academy of Education, Dr. psychological sciences Viktor Ivanovich Slobodchikov.
Victor Ivanovich, in order to get closer to the truth of instilling chastity in a child, tell us in general outline, is this quality innate or acquired? Where to look for the foundations of chastity? Is a newborn baby chaste?
In this matter, I would deliberately want to avoid identifying this concept with virginity. The “chastity” of a person must be considered in in a broad sense: its harmony and hierarchy as a whole. Unfortunately, a word that seems to be understandable to everyone, directly meaning “whole” and “integrity”, in everyday interpretation is considered precisely as the integrity of the body, and the destruction of chastity is perceived as a loss of innocence. Chastity in the broadest sense existed in a person only once in this world - at the moment: everything in him was perfect, harmonious, hierarchical. As a result of the Fall, the harmony in man was immediately destroyed and
hierarchy: each authority began to fight for power, the body actually occupied the soul, putting it at its service, and together they began to resist the spirit, block it, imposing their own meanings and goals. Although modern man enters this world with an inherent ability for chastity, this quality must someday manifest itself in a person, by analogy with a photographic image appearing on photographic paper, and gradually increase.
Having created man and woman, the Lord immediately created a house of chastity - a family. And if we are talking about the education of chastity in our days, first of all we need to pay attention to how our family is structured, what the father and mother are like, what kind of relationship they have with each other, with the children, what do they offer and present to the children? Chastity develops in children only thanks to the example of parents, that is, it all starts with us - it is not an evil environment that distorts and destroys chastity in a child, but first of all his incorrect upbringing! Chastity is not written in the genotype, nor does it “live” in moral precepts. No teachings, instructions and calls to “be good, be well-mannered, be polite, be like this”, as in the song “become the way I want”, give anything! Chastity is God's plan for man and exists in the structure life together children and adults. Just as adults without children are meaningless beings, so a child without adults is an impossible being. Therefore, the first commandment of a parent, the first task of adults, is to look at our own life structure: are we living correctly? The child’s actions are determined by the three-dimensional picture of the world that develops in his parents’ home! Consequently, chastity, as an internal fundamental quality of a person, is acquired (note, not appropriated!) by the child through the joint existence of adults and children.
“Living” between us, it becomes that inner skeleton, that absolute value and strength that allows a growing person to resist and protect himself in any situation. life situations. If this child-adult community is destroyed, then all hopes for chastity are simply meaningless, because those very vital conditions will not remain.
- What threats are most dangerous to a child’s chastity?
Due to the tripartite nature of man, a blow to chastity can occur anywhere. For example, bodily sensuality arouses the mental and spiritual in him, and for someone, corruption can begin at the mental level - with emotions, experiences, pictures, etc. It is known that in addition to the memory of time, there is imprinting, that is, a memory-seal, when a picture from a child’s life is imprinted in the subconscious, and then pops up and turns out to be a provocateur of a person’s actions in his later life.
A direct threat to chastity is the connivance and irresponsibility of parents, when they are simply too lazy to think: it’s all nonsense, “no matter what the child enjoys, as long as he doesn’t cry”! In cultivating an integral perception of the world, that is, chastity, every little detail is important: for example, many modern toys are aimed at destruction, at alienating and isolating the child from the family. Instead of playing with the child, the modern mother often thrusts a toy at him just so that he gets away from her: “You tinker with it, and meanwhile I’ll take care of the others.” important matters" But through a toy, the child discovers the facets of the world into which he will have to enter and live!
Understand, we need to return to ourselves the original meanings of our existence, only then can we realize that raising a child is a colossal responsibility, colossal art and work, which involves seeing the prospects of a growing person: “I am already now, while my newly born baby is two days old , must think about what will happen to him at twenty or thirty years old.”
Today, the parent is placed in conditions where he must, whether he knows it or not, whether he knows how or not, be concerned only with how to professionally prepare the child, first for school, then junior school student prepare professionally for high school, then professionally prepare for university. There is total “professionalization”: parents are concerned about how to equip their child with the most competencies - only in this case will he be socially more “successful”. What kind of chastity can we talk about when a little person is formatted and specialized to meet the demands and expectations from the outside? This is what replaced the task of normal nurturing of a viable, life-resistant, life-loving, and therefore chaste person - it was reduced, at best, to medical use! And this is a violation in education, which I would formulate in the form of a kind of anthropological law: “Any prematurity: intellectual, physical, emotional-sensual, is of a corrupting nature.”
Developmental psychologists know that today’s action will come back to haunt you not tomorrow, or even the day after tomorrow, but much later. Deprived of this sense of time and delayed consequences modern parent. The word “corruption” means mortification (from “corruption” - dying), causing something that is a molecule, the cause of death. That is, prematurity is not just the destruction of chastity, it is its killing.
The current total physical unchastity, not to mention moral unchastity, was the result of that same accelerating process of any prematurity in education. Its participants include both parents and society - everyone must understand their responsibility.
We don’t even realize that we are succumbing to some kind of unspoken order, an irresistible impulse: “we must be on time, we must not be late.” And what does it mean? This means: forget about God, family, father and mother - everything later, they will not go anywhere, the main thing is not to be late “there”, the main thing is to be on time “there”! But in reality it turns out: he managed to get there, but there was nothing left in his hands. They wonder, for example, why the girl suddenly went to a casting in Moscow, and then doesn’t know how to return to her home. own village to parents! Yes, here, at the casting, they “died” in her mind, although they were physically alive - a gulf had formed between the child and the parents!
- If we talk about educating chastity in boys and girls, is there a difference in approaches?
Without understanding the starting point, the nature of man and woman in God's plan, we will not be able to seriously understand what is happening to us.
Every newborn comes into this world with the task of realizing God’s plan in it. Unfortunately, many simplify the task of instilling chastity in children: “Give me a recipe on how to do it.” But the task is more global: it is necessary to educate not abstract chastity, but a boy-man-father and a girl-woman-wife! It is pointless to talk about the chastity of a boy if there is no upbringing of a boy as a man and a father. It makes no sense to talk about the chastity of a girl if there is no upbringing of a girl-woman, and not just a woman, but also a mother. The fact is that "boy" is a "man's" maiden name, just as "child" is a person's maiden name, and "girl" is a "woman's" maiden name.
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Ever-memorable, an Orthodox priest, psychologist, teacher, public and scientific figure, for the first time seriously considered this issue from a spiritual point of view, and not from the point of view only of the age and gender characteristics of a man or woman. Before him, at best, the behavioral characteristics of boys and girls were described: for example, why the former tend to play with cars, and the latter - with dolls. What is behind this, what does it mean? A man and a woman, both have their own mission in the joint construction of a family - a small Church. Building a family is based on two pillars: a man and a woman, a father and a mother, and the whole question is how these pillars grow, that is, how to raise worthy builders of a house of chastity from a boy and a girl!
In his book “Introduction to Christian Psychology,” Father Boris calls the education of boys the cornerstone of pedagogy and says: “What kind of boys we are raising today - the whole fate of our state will depend on this.” The most important point education of chastity in a boy, in his opinion, should be the education of patriotism, which means awareness native land as one’s own, and oneself as responsible for it, for its well-being, awareness of oneself in dialogue with the living history of the land, in a number of generations that inhabited this land. This is, finally, the formation of readiness, without judging, to forgive the mistakes of fathers and grandfathers and atone for them with one’s life. The latter can be called straightening the path of the clan (family) and the people as a whole. He notes two more fundamental masculine qualities that need to be cultivated in boys. This courage is the foundation of the boy’s character, and sacrifice is the pinnacle of his spiritual character.
And then he lists important moral qualities, psychological abilities, which, in his opinion, are relevant for the education of today's boys: the concept of sin, the experience of repentance in God; the experience of grace, joy and peace after sincere prayer, closeness with nature, sacrifice, a feeling of shame and pity, tolerance for any other position against the background of a calm and deep awareness of one’s own - and all this should be unfolded, in his opinion, in time, experimentally. Father Boris especially emphasizes that the lack of spiritual education gives rise to idleness of soul in children. “Idleness, emptiness, lack of demand for the soul arises even with the formal workload of children in various schools, sections and circles. But a holy place is never empty. Purely energetically, the child’s soul is gradually filled with energies that have a graceless and often downright demonic nature. This is associated with excessive daydreaming and romanticism, often associated with a partial loss of a sense of reality. The depth of depression in many of today's children is increasingly combined with suicidal tendencies. He says that the reason for this is lack of courage and idleness, noting that modern boys And girls have a common moral vice - this is idleness of the soul, and mechanical employment in circles and sections only partly solves the problem of this emptiness of the soul.
Chastity could be included in the Red Book of virtues, if such a thing existed.
IN modern society concepts such as nobility, innocence, chastity are perceived rather as relics of the past, and only Christianity supports the value of purity of soul and integrity of mind, which are not soiled by passions.
Chastity in modern society
Chastity is a comprehensive word that includes:
The Russian language, rich in synonyms, calls impeccable, impeccable, sensible people chaste if they are characterized by honesty, integrity and modesty. This concept also includes virginity, which is compared to a girl’s color and innocence.
IN explanatory dictionary edited by Ushakov, chastity is equated with virtue and rigor in relation to morals, this is moral purity.
On a note! A more accurate and acceptable concept in modern society is given in Dahl's dictionary, where chaste is a person, both man and woman, who retained virginity before entering into marriage and managed to live a pure, immaculate life. family life.
In a healthy society, where the concept of purity, dignity and honor is valued, chastity is positive characteristic a person who knows how to set limits in life that self-prohibit the entry into it of anything that could weaken the resistance to evil.
What is chastity in Orthodoxy
IN mass consciousness chastity is associated with renunciation sexual relations in general, this is entering monasticism, or maintaining purity both before and during marriage. In the pre-Christian period, people who sinned in fornication were tied by their hands and feet to the ground and thrown with stones. Let us remember the harlot who was brought to Jesus for judgment. The priests demanded execution, and only the wise and merciful command of Christ saved the woman from death.
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Many parents and their children have gone astray, which means they have accepted fornication as the norm in this matter. For some reason, some mothers allow their sons to have physical fun on the side, but they only want to accept a virgin as a daughter-in-law.
Outside of marriage, chastity is associated with maintaining virginity, and in marriage – with maintaining marital fidelity
The Kingdom of Heaven will not apply to those who limit themselves only to food, observing fasts, but do not lead a chaste life, which is based on the shame of falling into depravity.
Only the deep-rooted concept of a chaste life can protect and strengthen the soul of a Christian. For a church-going Christian, it is important to understand that “I want” and “I can” do not always apply to chaste people. You cannot desire the body of another person, to whom you have no responsibility, no respect, moving only by instincts, then the person is comparable to a beast.
You can’t just have a person, you have to love him! Fornication erases all boundaries of decency, the world recognizes the right of gays and lesbians to demonstrate feelings, for this sin the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah were burned by God.
True love, which believes everything and covers everything (Cor. 13), was replaced by lustful desires, removing the concept of chastity and innocence from life.
The teaching of Christ showed the world the truth of virginity through the example of the Blessed Virgin Mary, the behavior of the saints. Living according to God’s commandments and following Christ’s instructions becomes chaste, protected from sinful thoughts and deeds.
Important! Every Christian can repent of fornication and cleave to the virgin life true Christian.
Holy Fathers on chastity
Many people perceive the word “chastity” as the concept of innocence. However, this word describes not just the physiological state of a person, virgin, faithful in marriage, it is much broader. Understand chastity without knowledge religious foundations almost impossible, only the Bible gives a clear understanding of sin and righteousness, which can be acquired through obedience.
Among Catholics, this concept is expressed in the celibacy of priests - celibacy.
Nun Nina, known throughout the world as Krygina, defined chastity as a holistic attitude to life, seasoned with wisdom.
According to John Climacus, this word united all the virtues.
In the notes of Saint Ignatius Brianchaninov, chastity is an evasion from all sinful thoughts and deeds, which includes voluptuous conversations and the utterance of nasty expressions.
Chastity is strict moral and bodily purity, avoidance of fornication and debauchery
The concept of virtue includes keeping one's senses, which include sight, hearing and touch, in purity and modesty.
To become chaste, a person needs to learn:
- silence and stillness;
- dwelling in thoughts about heaven and hell;
- giving up lustful fantasies;
- serve the poor and orphans.
The notes of Saint Ambrose of Milan give three forms of this virtue - chastity: widowhood, husband and wife, virginity.
St. Ambrose writes that this is a virtue not for praise, but as a gift of the riches of Christian discipline.
The statement of the priest of the Russian Orthodox Church, Archimandrite John Krestyankin, who left this world in 2006 sounds like a hymn to purity; he calls this virtue the beauty of the soul, filled with truth, spiritual health, which is expressed in prudence and courage to resist the evil of the world.
Nowadays, the ruling Russian clergyman Pavel Gumerov in his sermons calls on parishioners to keep not only their eyes clean, but also their minds, for sinful thoughts and thoughts cover both the soul and the heart with dirt.
In addition to ministers, great writers, publicists and playwrights also wrote about purity of morals. Representative of French philosophy Albert Camus, argued that in unbridledness a person loses the meaning of existence, and only chastity can return the meaning of life to humanity.
The expression of the 18th century French playwright Pierre Auguste Caron de Beaumarchais is beautiful: God's Heaven always patronizes innocent, pure-hearted people.
Holy Bible encourages chastity and purity
How to Cultivate Chastity
According to John Cassian, without life position based on the humility found in the heart, one cannot clothe oneself with chastity. We can force ourselves by force of will to observe fasts, go hungry, constantly work and remain in prayer, but we can never acquire purity, for it is given only by the Creator by His great mercy.
Only the Savior can free us from passions, seeing ourselves constantly engaged in the struggle of faith and humility. To acquire this virtue, Christians must crave purity, just as a greedy person overcomes everything for the sake of wealth, and a lover who is ready to overcome all obstacles on the way to his beloved. It is also necessary to fight passions.
About passions:
Only an insatiable desire to become blameless in the eyes of the Creator and Savior, a willingness to sacrifice food, drink and even sleep, to renounce insidious seductive thoughts, can fill a Christian with chastity.
This feat can be accomplished only by the grace of the mercy of the Almighty God. To achieve chastity, you do not need severity towards yourself, but love for God and the ability to enjoy your own sincere purity.
At present, unfortunately, such qualities as moral purity and modesty remain unappreciated in society. Young people want to be liberated and independent, often such desires have a vulgar and vulgar connotation.
Many people don’t even know what chastity is; this concept means virginity, chastity before marriage, that is, the non-engagement of a girl or guy intimate relationships with the opposite sex. Actually this is not true. What does this concept mean?
The virtue of chastity is a moral quality that every person should possess. Synonyms for this word can be purity, innocence, modesty, prudence, nobility.
Wikipedia says that chastity is a designation of bodily, spiritual and mental purity.
In Orthodoxy, this is renunciation of sinful actions and thoughts, maintaining purity of thoughts regardless of external negative influences.
Another nineteenth-century preacher, Ignatius Brianchaninov, argues that this virtue lies in the renunciation of “fornication,” voluptuousness, and ambiguity in business, conversation, and dreams.
He called on all Christians to remain silent more, to help the weak and crippled, and most importantly, to constantly think about hellish torment and the deaths that await us. In his opinion, you can become chaste through obedience - to God, parents, law, husband.
Useful video: 14 reasons to remain celibate
Let's sum it up
Chastity is a gift from God, it is an inexhaustible source of peace and joy. A person cannot acquire it only through his own efforts and efforts, it is given by the grace of God, so let us tirelessly ask the Almighty for this.
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