Conflicts are integral part of human life.

The ability to behave competently in adverse circumstances is the key to peace and self-confidence.

For this reason, it is useful for any person to study examples of what conflict situations can be and how to resolve them.

How to avoid conflict between teacher and student? Learn about it from ours.

The concept and psychology of conflictology

- what it is? In short, this is clash of interests, opinions and views.

As a result of the conflict, a crisis situation arises in which each participant in the conflict seeks to impose his point of view on the other side.

An unstoppable conflict can lead to open confrontation, in which the subject of the dispute is relegated to the background and the ambitions of the parties come to the fore.

As a rule, as a result of the conflict, there are no losers and winners, since all participants expend their energy and, as a result, do not receive positive emotions.

special danger represent internal conflicts, when a person is tormented by conflicting thoughts and desires that tear him apart. Protracted states of internal conflicts often end in depression and neurosis.

A modern person needs to be able to recognize the emerging conflict in time, take competent steps to prevent the growth of the conflict and eliminate it at the stage of inception.

If, nevertheless, the conflict cannot be immediately extinguished, it is necessary to be able to build a correct and handle conflict well with minimal losses.

How does it arise?

As a result of numerous studies, it was determined that most conflicts arise without the corresponding intentions of their participants.

Often people involuntarily react to the conflictogens of other people, or they themselves are a source of conflictogens, as a result of which a stressful situation arises.

conflictogens- words, actions, deeds leading to conflict. They arise when participants have any psychological problems, or are used purposefully to achieve their goals.

Most conflictogens manifest themselves for the following reasons:

• thirst for superiority. The desire to prove their worth;
• aggressiveness. Initially aggressive behavior towards other people, caused by a negative emotional state;
• selfishness. Striving to achieve your goals at any cost.

How do conflicts arise? True causes and solutions:

Popular methods of resolving the situation

The most effective strategies that are most often used in practice for conflict management are:

About ways to resolve conflicts in this video:

Resolution Methods

From a scientific point of view, there are specific methods for resolving conflict:

Structural

Most often used in the professional field. These include:

constructive

How to resist aggression and successfully resolve the conflict? Similar ways of resolving conflicts are more used in communication.

In order to successfully resolve the situation using constructive methods, it is necessary to form an adequate perception of the situation among the participants, arrange them for open interaction, create an atmosphere of goodwill and trust, jointly determine the root of the problem.

Design styles include:

Integral

Allows each side to feel like a winner. A similar effect is achieved when the parties agree to abandon their original positions, reconsider the situation and find a solution that satisfies everyone.

The method can only be applied if the parties to the dispute demonstrate flexibility of thinking and the ability to adapt to new circumstances.

Compromise

The most peaceful, mature way resolution of the situation.

The parties decide on mutual concessions in order to eliminate the negative factors that caused the dispute.

Such behavior of people makes it possible not only to peacefully resolve emerging contradictions without prejudice to anyone but also to build long-term communication relationships.

Way out of the conflict

How to get out of conflict situations? To get out of a difficult situation you need to take the following steps:

1. Stop using words or doing actions that provoke a negative response from your opponent.
2. Do not respond to such behavior on the part of the interlocutor.
3. Demonstrate affection towards another person. You can do this with the help of gestures, facial expressions, words. Smiling, patting on the shoulder, shaking hands, using polite phrases - all this helps to smooth out disputes.

   The interlocutor immediately acquires a positive attitude and the situation is soon resolved.

Examples of conflict situations

In society

It's best to resolve using constructive methods.

For example, the neighbors of an apartment building may come into conflict over the distribution of parking spaces in the yard.

Some neighbors will insist on the organization of clear markings, according to which each car is assigned a specific parking space. Other tenants will advocate for the possibility of a free arrangement of cars.

In this situation the most effective methods of resolving a dispute would be to build a dialogue, joint resolution of the situation through compromise.

It is enough for the residents to organize a meeting and make a decision at it that part of the area in the courtyard is allocated for individual parking, while the other part remains for the supporters of arbitrary parking.

Between employees

It is better to solve structural methods.

For example, employees of the same team may come into conflict in connection with inability to work together in the same direction.

Each defines for himself a range of responsibilities, which is not approved by his colleague. The result is the emergence of a conflict situation and the inefficiency of joint work.

The manager of the employees involved in the dispute must apply the methods of clarifying the requirements, setting goals and assigning remuneration.

Each employee will be explained the principle of his work, a clear range of job responsibilities. In front of colleagues common goals will be set, reaching which they will receive the promised reward (bonus, promotion, etc.).

How to properly resolve conflicts? Find out from the video:

Completion Forms

What is the form of the end of the conflict? A conflict of interest can be completed as follows:

1. Permission. The prerequisites may be the desire of the parties to end the dispute and not return to it in the future. For the final resolution of the conflict may require the involvement of third parties. This is especially true in the area of ​​professional relationships.
2. attenuation. The dispute may cease to be relevant for one of the parties, or for all participants in the process. In the first case, the other side does not find a response to its own words and actions and is forced to end the conflict. In the second case, the parties simultaneously decide that they do not want to continue the dispute due to fatigue, the end of arguments, loss of interest in the subject of the dispute, etc.

   This type of end to the conflict is not always the case, since when a new stimulus arises, the dispute can resume with renewed vigor.

3. Settlement. The parties come to a compromise, reach mutual agreements. As a result, the dispute is resolved through constructive dialogue and effective interpersonal interaction.
4. elimination. The basis of the conflict is eliminated, transformed, modified, etc. In other words, the subject of the dispute ceases to be relevant at the current time and the fact of a conflict of interest automatically disappears.
5. Growing into a new dispute. Unexplained contradictions on one issue can become a source of new conflicts generated by the primary dispute. Especially often, a similar effect is observed when a remark made by one of the spouses on any issue develops into a mutual exchange of reproaches.

Completion is not always a solution

Does the end of a conflict always mean its resolution? It is important not to confuse the concept of the end of a conflict situation with its resolution.

End of the conflict- this is the moment of the end of the actions of the parties at the current time, the termination of the dispute for various reasons (attenuation, development into a new dispute, etc.)

Completing a dispute now does not guarantee that it will will not reappear after some time. This is due to the fact that the source of the conflict is not dividing anywhere, and the parties have not reached any result.

Conflict resolution involves the conscious application of methods and techniques aimed at correcting the negative situation that has arisen.

The resolved conflict allows the parties to reconcile and no longer return to the subject of the dispute.

Thus, conflict can arise in any area of ​​human life. as a result of the conflict of his interests with the interests of other people.

There are many ways to get out of conflict. It is important to be able to put them into practice before the situation has moved to a serious level.

How to communicate with other people if you have different points of view on some issues with them, in this video:

Undoubtedly, in the life of every person there was a moment when he wanted to avoid confrontation and asked himself the question of how to resolve the conflict. But there are also circumstances when there is a desire to adequately get out of a difficult conflict situation, while maintaining relationships. Some people are faced with the need to escalate the conflict in order to finally resolve it. In any case, each of us faced the question of how to resolve the conflict or how to avoid it.

First of all, you need to understand that conflict is a completely normal state of the individual. All the time while a person realizes conscious life activity, he is in conflict with other people, groups of individuals or with himself. However, if you learn the skills that will help you understand how to resolve conflict, you can significantly develop and strengthen personal and professional relationships. The resolution of social conflicts is a rather serious skill that can be very useful.

Many people have no idea what specific conflicts they are involved in, much less realize the true causes of conflicts. As a result, they cannot effectively manage them. Timely unresolved conflicts between personalities at one fine moment will lead to intrapersonal conflicts and rather undesirable consequences. Unfulfilled desires and eternal experiences can cause health problems. In addition, they often spoil the character and turn a person into a loser dissatisfied with everything in the world, pushing a person down the social ladder. If such a prospect is far from attractive to you, you should carefully figure out how to resolve the conflict if it occurs. There are many ways to resolve conflicts, so you can easily master the most necessary skills.

Let's take a look at what conflict is. In psychology, this term is defined as a collision of incompatible and oppositely directed tendencies in relationships between individuals, groups of people or in the mind of an individual, leading to negative emotional experiences.

Based on this definition, the foundation of a conflict situation is a clash of interests, goals and ideas. Quite clearly, conflict manifests itself when people do not agree on their values, motivations, ideas, desires or perceptions. Often such differences look rather trivial. However, when the conflict involves strong feelings, basic needs become the basis of the problem. These include the need for security, solitude, closeness, awareness of one's own value or significance. Correct resolving interpersonal conflicts primarily focuses on the primary needs of people.

Specialists have developed a variety of ways to resolve conflicts and recommendations regarding various aspects of the behavior of individuals in situations of conflict of interest or opinion. Based on the possible models of conflict resolution, the goals and interests of the parties, there are the following styles of conflict resolution.

• The competitive style is used when a person is quite active and intends to move towards resolving a conflict situation, wanting to satisfy his own interests first of all, often to the detriment of the interests of other people. Such a person forces others to accept his way of solving the problem. This behavior model gives a chance to realize the strengths of any idea, even if they are not to their liking. Among all methods of conflict resolution, this one is one of the most severe. You should choose this style only in the situation when you have all the necessary resources to resolve the conflict in your favor, and also when you are sure that your decision is correct. If speak about leadership roles, then it is periodically useful for him to make tough authoritarian decisions, which in the future give a positive result. Of all conflict resolution methods, this style of behavior most effectively teaches employees to obey without undue ranting, and also helps restore faith in success in difficult situations for the company.

In most cases, rivalry implies a fairly strong position. But it happens that such a model of behavior is resorted to due to weakness. Often this happens when a person loses hope of winning the current conflict, and he seeks to prepare the ground for inciting another. As an example, consider a situation where a younger child deliberately provokes an older child, receives a well-deserved “reward”, and then immediately complains to parents from the position of the victim. In addition, there are situations in which a person enters into a confrontation solely because of his stupidity, without realizing what consequences this or that conflict will have for him. However, most likely, if a person reads this article, he is unlikely to intentionally fall into such a disadvantageous situation for himself and will choose this particular one among all in special situations.

• The evasion due to weakness style is often used when the potential loss in a particular conflict is much higher than the moral cost associated with "flight". At the same time, flight may not always be some kind of physical action. It is not uncommon for people in leadership positions to evade a controversial decision by postponing or rescheduling an unwanted meeting or conversation indefinitely. As excuses, the manager may talk about the loss of documents or give useless tasks regarding the collection of additional information on some issue. Often the problem just gets more complicated, so don't avoid conflicts this way too often. Try your best ways to resolve conflicts choose this one when it really suits you.

It is a completely different matter when such a style of behavior is resorted to because of strength. It is then that such a method is absolutely justified. A strong personality can use time to his advantage in order to gather the necessary resources in order to win the conflict. At the same time, you should not deceive yourself and convince yourself that you are not really afraid of an escalation of the conflict, but are only waiting for the right moment to resolve the situation in your favor. Remember that this moment may never come. Therefore, this style of conflict resolution should be used wisely.

• The style of adaptation lies in the fact that a person acts, focusing on the behavior of other people, while not striving to defend his own interests. In such a situation, he recognizes the dominance of the opponent and concedes victory to him in the conflict. This model of behavior can be justified when you understand that by giving in to someone, you do not lose much. It is recommended to choose from all ways of conflict resolution the style of accommodation when you are trying to maintain relationships and peace with another person or group of people, or if you realize that you were still wrong. You can use this pattern of behavior when you don't have enough power or other resources to win a particular conflict, or when you realize that winning is much more important to your opponent than to you. In this case, the subject practicing the accommodation style seeks to find a solution that will satisfy both conflicting parties.

The use of this strategy due to weakness is used when it is impossible to avoid conflict for some reason, and resistance can potentially significantly harm the individual. As an example, consider the situation when you meet a company of arrogant hooligans at night in a deserted place. In this situation, it is much more reasonable to choose the above-described method of resolving interpersonal conflicts and part with the phone, rather than join a fight and still lose your property. However, in the second case, serious harm can be done to your health.

Looking at this style of behavior in the context of a business, you can analyze the situation when a new company enters the market with much more powerful financial, technical and administrative resources than your company has. In such a situation, of course, you can put all your strength and capabilities into an active fight against a competitor, but the probability of losing remains very high. In this situation, it would be more rational to try to adapt by finding a new market niche or, in extreme cases, by selling the company to a stronger player in the market.

The accommodating due to strength strategy is used when you are aware of the pitfalls your opponent will face if he sticks to it. In this situation, you allow the other person to "enjoy" the consequences of his actions.

• The style of cooperation implies that the subject seeks to resolve the conflict for the sake of his own interests, but at the same time does not ignore the interests of the opponent and tries together with him to find ways for the outcome of the situation to be beneficial to both. Among the typical circumstances in which this style is used, we can mention the following: both parties have the same opportunities and resources to resolve a problem; conflict resolution is beneficial to both parties and no one wants to get away from it; the presence of interdependent and long-term relationships between opponents; each of the conflicting parties is able to clearly explain their goals, express their thoughts and come up with alternative ways out of the situation. The resolution of social conflicts in this way may be the most acceptable.

Cooperation due to strength takes place when each side has enough time and energy to find more significant common interests than those that caused the conflict. After the opponents come to an understanding of global interests, you can start looking for a way to jointly realize the interests of a lower level. Unfortunately, in practice, this method of conflict resolution is not always effective due to its complexity. . The process of resolving the conflict in this way requires tolerance on both sides.

Cooperation due to weakness is like accommodation. However, those who practice this style are often called collaborators or traitors. Such a strategy can be effective if no obvious changes in the alignment of forces of the conflicting parties are foreseen in the future.

• The compromise style implies that the opponents seek to find a solution based on mutual concessions. Such a strategy of behavior of the conflicting parties is appropriate when they want the same thing, but at the same time they believe that it is impossible to achieve this at the same time. As an example, consider the following situations: the parties have equal resources, but there is a mutually exclusive interest; a temporary solution can suit each of the conflicting parties; both opponents will be satisfied with a short-term gain. The style of compromise often becomes the best or even the last possible method of resolving conflicts.

The main ways to resolve the conflict

All existing conflict resolution methods can be divided into two groups: negative methods (types of struggle, the purpose of which is to achieve the victory of one side) and positive methods. The term "negative methods" is used in the sense that the result of the conflict will be the destruction of the relationship of unity of the parties participating in the confrontation. The result of positive methods should be the preservation of unity between the conflicting parties. This includes various types of constructive competition and negotiations.

It should be understood that conflict resolution methods are divided into positive and negative conditionally. In practice, both methodologies can harmoniously complement each other. Moreover, the term "struggle" in the context of conflict resolution is quite general in terms of its content. It is no secret that the negotiation process often includes elements of a struggle on some issues. In the same way, the tough struggle of the conflicting parties in no way precludes negotiations on specific rules. It is impossible to imagine progress without creative rivalry between old and new ideas. At the same time, both conflicting parties pursue one goal - the development of a certain area.

Despite the fact that there are many types of struggle, each of them has common features, since any struggle involves the interaction of two subjects, in which one interferes with the other.

The main condition for victory in the event of an armed struggle is the achievement of unambiguous superiority and the concentration of forces at the point of the main battle. A similar technique characterizes the basic strategy of other types of struggle, which, for example, is a game of chess. The winner is the one who can concentrate the pieces in the place where the decisive line of attack on the opponent's king is located.

In any struggle, one should be able to correctly choose the field of the decisive battle, concentrate forces in this place and choose the moment to attack. Any method of struggle involves a certain combination of these basic components.

The main goal of the struggle is to change the conflict situation. This can be achieved in the following ways:

• Impact on the opponent, his defense and the situation;
• Change in the balance of power;
• False or true information of the enemy about his intentions;
• Obtaining a correct assessment of the situation and the capabilities of the enemy.

Different methods of struggle use all these methods in different combinations.

Let's look at some of the methods that are used in the fight. One of them is the achievement of victory by obtaining the necessary freedom of action. This method can be implemented by the following methods: the formation of freedom of action for oneself; restriction of freedom of the opponent; the acquisition of more advantageous positions in the confrontation, even at the cost of losing certain benefits, etc. For example, in the process of a dispute, the method of imposing on the opponent those in which he is incompetent can be very effective. Thus, a person can compromise himself.

Quite effective is the method of using the opponent's reserves by one conflicting party for its own benefit. An excellent technique that demonstrates the effectiveness of the method can be forcing the enemy to take actions that are useful to the other side.

An important method of struggle is the primary incapacitation of the main control centers of the conflicting complexes. They can be leading individuals or institutions, as well as the main elements of the opponent's position. During the discussion (here without the art of public speaking it is difficult to manage), discrediting the leading representatives of the enemy side and refuting the theses of their position is actively practiced. For example, in the process of political struggle, a fairly effective method is to criticize the negative traits of leaders, as well as to demonstrate their failure.

The main principle of resolving any conflict is efficiency and timeliness. However, in the process of struggle, the method of dragging out the case, which is also called the "delay method", can be used quite successfully. This technique is a special case when the right time and place for the final blow is chosen, as well as the creation of a favorable balance of power.

A slow transition to decisive action may be appropriate when it is necessary to concentrate significant resources to win a victory. The aphorism “time works for us” clearly describes the main essence of this method. If we talk about the discussion, then this method implies the desire to take the floor last, when all the opponents have spoken. In such a situation, there is a chance to make arguments that have not been seriously attacked in previous speeches.

The wire method has been used for a long time. Plutarch described the case when this style was applied by the Roman dictator Sulla. When he realized that he was surrounded by significant enemy forces, he called the second consul, Scipio, to his negotiations. After that, lengthy meetings and meetings began, in which Sulla each time postponed the adoption of a final decision. At the same time, he corrupted the morale of the enemy soldiers with the help of his cunning assistants. Scipio's warriors were bribed with money and other valuables. As a result, when the troops of Sulla approached the camp of Scipio, the soldiers went over to the side of the dictator, and the second consul was captured in his camp.

Avoiding the fight is also a fairly effective method, which is partly related to the previous one. In this case, the process of conflict resolution occurs in the style of evasion. It is used in a number of cases: when the task of mobilizing resources and forces for victory remains unresolved; to lure an opponent into a trap prepared in advance in order to buy time and change the situation to a more profitable one.

positive conflict resolution methods primarily includes negotiations. When there is a special emphasis on negotiations as part of the conflict, the parties tend to conduct them from a position of strength in order to achieve a unilateral victory. It goes without saying that this nature of the negotiations leads only to a partial resolution of the conflict. At the same time, negotiations are only an addition on the way to victory over the opponent. In the case when negotiations are considered as a method of conflict resolution, they take the form of open debate, implying mutual concessions and partial satisfaction of the interests of both parties.

The method of negotiations based on certain principles can be characterized by four fundamental rules, each of which constitutes an element of negotiations and is a recommendation for their conduct.

• Separate the concepts of "participant in negotiations" and "subject of negotiations". Since any person who participates in negotiations has certain character traits, it is not worth discussing an individual person, as this will introduce a number of emotional barriers. V the process of criticism participants in the negotiations themselves only escalate.
• Focus on interests, not positions, since the latter can hide the true goals of the negotiators. At the same time, conflicting positions are often based on interests. That is why it is worth focusing on the latter. It is worth remembering that opposing positions always hide more interests than those reflected in the positions themselves.
• Consider conflict resolution options that are beneficial to both parties. Interest-based bargaining encourages participants to find a win-win solution by looking at options that will satisfy both parties. Thus, the debate takes on the character of a dialogue “we against the problem” instead of a discussion in the format “me against you”.
• Look for objective criteria. Consent must be based on neutral criteria in relation to opponents. Only in this case, the consensus will be fair and lasting. Subjective criteria lead to the infringement of one of the parties and the complete destruction of agreement. Objective criteria are formed on the basis of a clear understanding of the essence of the problems.

The fairness of the decisions made directly depends on the conflict resolution procedures, such as the elimination of disputes by drawing lots, delegating decision making to a third party, etc. Variations on the latter style of conflict resolution are numerous.

Remember that high emotionality in the process of conflict resolution is a barrier to its successful resolution. The ability to conduct effective social conflict resolution directly depends on your skills, such as:

• Calmness and stress resistance. Such personal qualities will allow you to more calmly evaluate verbal and non-verbal communications.
• The ability to control your behavior and emotions. If you know how to do this, you will always convey your needs to your opponent without undue annoyance or intimidation.
• The ability to listen and pay attention to the words and expression of feelings of other people.
• Understanding that everyone deals with situations differently.
• The ability to avoid offensive actions and words.

To acquire such skills, you need to develop stress resistance and the ability to control your emotions. So you will feel comfortable ways to resolve conflicts difficult level.

What else you need to know about conflict resolution

Incomplete resolution of interpersonal conflicts leads to their renewal. However, you should not take it as a flawed action, since not every conflict can be resolved the first time. For example, political parties are in constant battles that do not stop for many years throughout the entire period of their existence.

Conflict can be viewed as an opportunity for development. If you can resolve conflict in a relationship, you will be rewarded with trust. You have confidence that your relationship will not collapse from various troubles.

If a conflict looks intimidating in your eyes, it means that you subconsciously expect that it will not be resolved mutually beneficially. For many, conflict in a relationship looks like something dangerous and frightening. In some cases, it can actually be traumatic, especially if the experience has left you feeling powerless and out of control. In this case, you come into conflict with a sense of threat and, accordingly, cannot resolve it qualitatively. In most cases, you will make concessions or, conversely, become angry.

Everyone, if desired, can effectively use these conflict resolution methods. However, an individual may have one most commonly used style of conflict resolution. Depending on how assertive and active a person is, he chooses one strategy or another. You can choose the best conflict resolution styles that are right for you.

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Each conflict is unique, and it is impossible to foresee the best way out of it. But still, knowing the recommendations of psychologists will greatly simplify this task.

The first step is to recognize and analyze the conflict situation. To do this, it is necessary to determine the cause and goals of the conflict (paying attention to the discrepancy between the true and declared goals) and assess the potential threat (what the conflict can lead to). When determining the cause of the conflict, you need to clarify for yourself as accurately as possible what in your partner’s actions seems unacceptable to you and what is unacceptable to him. It should be borne in mind that not every dispute is dictated by the need to reveal the "truth", it can reflect both long-held resentment, hostility and jealousy, and be used as an opportunity to humiliate an opponent in someone's eyes, or play the role of the "last straw" if necessary, "free" from the accumulated irritation, anger.

For timely recognition of the conflict and making the right decision, it is necessary to answer the following questions:

How is the problem perceived by the other party?

What is at the root of the problem? Its meaning for each of the parties.

How likely is this situation to develop into a conflict?

What is behind the other person's reactions?

Does the behavior of each of the opponents correspond to the situation (research shows that the strength of the reaction usually does not correspond to the significance of the conflict)?

What needs to be done to prevent conflict?

What should be done if the opposite side does not behave as we would like?

What are the possible consequences of a favorable and unfavorable development of the situation?

What is the level of physical danger for you?

It is necessary to clearly understand with whom the dispute or attempt to resolve the conflict is being fought. A self-confident opponent is usually verbose in communication and does not avoid a showdown. Unsure of his abilities, he tries to avoid a showdown, does not reveal his goals, but at the same time he can stubbornly stand his ground, hiding his weakness under "principledness".

It is very difficult to negotiate with a stubborn, primitive man, who is also convicted of power, whose goal is not to prove the truth in favor of the cause, but to use the slightest opportunity to show "who is the boss here." It is dangerous to conflict with intellectually narrow-minded or unbalanced people. Firstly, such a conflict does not lend itself to a logical conclusion, it is impossible to manage it, since emotions, and not common sense, are involved in it. Secondly, the style of behavior is monotonous - hostile, aggressive, easily moving to the lowest, primitive level - the level of insults, which increases hostility and makes it easier to move from verbal squabbles to physical clashes. When all the verbal "evidence" of such people is exhausted, they resort to the last argument - physical strength.

After the analysis is carried out, a conflict resolution strategy (behavior style) is chosen. Specialists distinguish five typical strategies of behavior in conflict situations. Each of the strategies listed below should only be used in the situation in which that strategy is appropriate.

Strategy "rivalry, competition"- an open struggle for one's interests, stubbornly defending one's position. It is effective when the result is important for both parties, and their interests are opposite, or when it is necessary to fundamentally solve the problem. This style is tough, in which the principle of "who wins", and dangerous, because there is a risk of losing. This strategy should be chosen when:

you have more opportunities (power, strength, etc.) than your opponent;

prompt and decisive action is required in case of unforeseen and dangerous situations;

nothing to lose and no other choice;

the outcome is very important to you, and you make a big bet on your solution to the problem that has arisen;

you have to "work" in front of other people whose opinion is not indifferent.

The strategy of "ignoring, avoiding conflict"- the desire to get out of the conflict situation without eliminating its causes. It is effective when it is necessary to postpone the solution of the problem to a later time in order to more seriously study the situation or find the necessary arguments and arguments. It is recommended when resolving a conflict with management. This strategy should be chosen when:

defending your position is unprincipled for you or the subject of disagreement is more significant for your opponent than for you;

the most important task is to restore calm and stability, not to resolve the conflict;

it opens the possibility of more complex problem situations in comparison with the one that is being considered now;

in the course of the conflict, you begin to understand that you are wrong;

the problem seems hopeless;

defending one's point of view requires a lot of time and considerable intellectual effort;

you are not particularly worried about what happened;

trying to solve the problem immediately is dangerous, since open discussion of the conflict can only worsen the situation.

Adaptation strategy- changing one's position, restructuring behavior, smoothing out contradictions, sometimes sacrificing one's own interests. Outwardly, it may look like you accept and share the opponent's position. Close to the "ignore" strategy. This style of behavior is used when:

the problem is unimportant for you;

need to gain time;

it is preferable to win a moral victory over the opponent, yielding to him.

"Cooperation" strategy- joint development of a solution that satisfies the interests of all parties, albeit a long one and consisting of several stages, but benefiting the cause. The most open and honest style involves active participation in resolving the conflict, taking into account your interests and your opponent. Often used to resolve open and protracted conflicts. Applies when:

it is necessary to find a common solution if the problem is too important for both sides, no one wants to give in, and therefore a compromise is impossible;

you have a close, long-term and interdependent relationship with the other party, and you want to maintain it;

there is time to work on the problem;

your capabilities are approximately equal to those of your opponent.

"Compromise" strategy- settlement of disagreements through mutual concessions. It is preferred in the case when it is impossible to do what both parties want at the same time. Options for compromise - making a temporary solution, adjusting the original goals, getting a certain part in order to avoid losing everything. The strategy is applied when:

the parties have equally convincing arguments;

it takes time to resolve complex issues;

it is necessary to make an urgent decision with a lack of time;

cooperation and directive assertion of one's point of view do not lead to success;

both parties have the same power and have mutually exclusive interests;

you may be satisfied with a temporary solution;

the satisfaction of your desire is not very important for you, and you can slightly change the goal set at the beginning;

At the second stage (conflict resolution), in accordance with the adopted strategy of behavior, it is necessary to accept the restrictions imposed by the enemy and impose their own restrictions. At the same time, it is necessary to quickly and easily rebuild and maneuver. When resolving a conflict situation, the following rules of behavior and response to a conflicting person should be taken into account:

You cannot immediately and completely deny someone’s opinion that does not coincide with yours, accept the tone, harshness and aggressiveness set by the conflict provocateur and respond to the attack with an attack (as soon as communication turns to raised tones, no one is heard except themselves).

You should show attention and benevolence to the interlocutor, tolerance for his features, show your sincere sympathy. Listen carefully to such a person, without interrupting or showing that you already know what he is going to say, because this is even more annoying. A good effect is given by the technique of direct repetition, interpretation or generalization of what is heard - thereby a person is given to understand that he has been heard and understood.

As soon as the opponent runs out, one should calmly express the opinion that “his position is very interesting, and it could be accepted” and similar approvals that affect the reduction of aggression, anger, indignation and initial fervor. Immediately add gently that "it is this idea (plan, position, desire, etc.) that is being developed (considered, discussed, adopted, etc.), but there are some nuances that require clarification and interfere ... "- this disarms even the most ardent, hostile opponent.

Personal confrontations must be avoided. You should not take profanity and verbal insults in your address, having understood for yourself that this person must be perceived as he presents himself, without trying to reason with him or call for decency.

Try to be restrained, control your movements, speech, facial expressions. Among other things, restraint and calmness reduce the general intensity of passions.

In an already developing conflict, one cannot rush to respond. It is best to pause, as if to "pass past the ears" any remarks and demands. Instead of answering the stated questions, ask your own question, completely off topic, in order to gain time to think about your tactics and strategy.

It is useful to distract the partner's attention from the painful issue, at least for a short time, while any tricks can be used - from asking to move to another place, calling, writing down something - to saying some ridiculous thought, joke, etc.

It is advisable to express to the interlocutor not ready-made assessments and opinions, but your feelings, states caused by his words: this will make your partner answer not in monosyllables, but in a detailed, motivated way, explaining his position. Before responding to criticism, remarks, reproaches, it is necessary to clearly understand what exactly is meant; you must be sure that you understand everything correctly.

Avoid closed postures, such as not folding your arms over your chest. You can not look the opponent directly in the eye - in this case, aggression may occur.

Very often, conflicting parties see fighting as the only possible way of being. They forget about other possibilities, they lose sight of the fact that they can achieve more if they solve problems constructively. The end of the conflict is sometimes achieved simply because the opponents get tired of fighting and adapt to coexistence. Having shown sufficient tolerance, if contacts are inevitable, they gradually learn to live in peace, without requiring from each other full agreement of views and habits..

Many different recommendations have been developed concerning various aspects of human behavior in situations of conflict, the choice of appropriate strategies and means for their resolution, as well as their management. Ways of resolving conflict situations are also considered, examples of effective psycho-trainings, practical recommendations and methods for resolving conflict situations based on the principles of aikido are given. The work is devoted to applied techniques for resolving conflicts, preventing their development, and the behavior of the conflicting parties.

It is important to consider both the actions of the participants in the conflict themselves, and the actions, the role of an intermediary, which can be a leader.

Conflict resolution is the elimination, in whole or in part, of the causes that gave rise to the conflict, or a change in the goals of the participants in the conflict.

Consider, first of all, the behavior of a person in a conflict situation from the point of view of its compliance with psychological standards. This model of behavior is based on the ideas of E. Melibruda "I-you-we: Psychological opportunities for improving communication." Its essence is as follows. It is believed that the constructive resolution of the conflict depends on the following factors:

The adequacy of the perception of the conflict, that is, a fairly accurate assessment of the actions, intentions, both of the enemy and one's own, not distorted by personal predilections;

Openness and effectiveness of communication, readiness for a comprehensive discussion of problems, when the participants honestly express their understanding of what is happening and the way out of the conflict situation;

It is also useful for a leader to know what character traits, features of human behavior are characteristic of a conflict personality. Summarizing the research of psychologists, we can say that the following can be attributed to such qualities:

Inadequate self-esteem of one's capabilities and abilities, which can be both overestimated and underestimated. In both cases, it may contradict an adequate assessment of others - and the ground for a conflict is ready;

The desire to dominate, by all means, where it is possible and impossible;

Conservatism of thinking, views, beliefs, unwillingness to overcome outdated traditions;

Excessive adherence to principles and straightforwardness in statements and judgments, the desire, by all means, to tell the truth in the eye;

A certain set of emotional personality traits: anxiety, aggressiveness, stubbornness, irritability.

The main most acceptable strategies of behavior in a conflict situation have been developed. They point out that there are five basic styles of behavior in conflict: accommodation, compromise, cooperation, ignoring, rivalry or competition. The style of behavior in a particular conflict is determined by the extent to which you want to satisfy your own interests, while acting passively or actively, and the interests of the other side, acting jointly or individually.

The style of competition, rivalry can be used by a person with a strong will, sufficient authority, power, not very interested in cooperation with the other side and striving first of all to satisfy his own interests.

However, it should be borne in mind that this is not a style that can be used in close personal relationships, since it cannot cause anything other than a feeling of alienation. It is also inappropriate to use it in a situation where you do not have sufficient power, and your point of view on some issue is at odds with the point of view of the boss.

The collaborative style can be used if, in defending your own interests, you are forced to take into account the needs and desires of the other party. This style is the most difficult, as it requires more work. The purpose of its application is to develop a long-term mutually beneficial solution. This style requires the ability to explain their desires to listen to each other, to restrain their emotions. The absence of one of these factors makes this style ineffective.

compromise style. Its essence lies in the fact that the parties seek to resolve differences with mutual concessions. In this regard, it somewhat resembles the style of cooperation, however, it is carried out at a more superficial level, since the parties are somewhat inferior to each other. This style is the most effective, both parties want the same thing, but they know that it is impossible to do it at the same time. For example, the desire to occupy the same position or the same premises for work. When using this style, the emphasis is not on a solution that satisfies the interests of both parties, but on an option that can be expressed in the words: "We cannot fully fulfill our desires, therefore, it is necessary to come to a solution that each of us could agree on" .

The avoidance style is usually implemented when the issue at hand is not so important to you, you do not stand up for your rights, do not cooperate with anyone to come up with a solution, and do not want to spend time and effort on solving it. This style is also recommended in cases where one of the parties has more power or feels that they are not right, or believes that there is no good reason to continue contact.

Accommodating style means that you act in concert with the other party, but do not try to defend your own interests in order to smooth the atmosphere and restore a normal working atmosphere. This style is most effective when the outcome of the case is extremely important to the other side and not very important to you or if you are sacrificing your own interests in favor of the other side.

As noted above, efforts to resolve the conflict can be made not only by persons directly involved in it, but also by a kind of outsiders - mediators. And they sometimes manage to do much more than the representatives of the confronting parties. It turns out that in order to resolve a conflict situation, the presence of a mediator is extremely important, most likely in psychological terms, since it allows the parties to the conflict, despite mutual concessions, to “save face”. There is a relationship between the concessions made by a person to other people and his idea of ​​himself as a "strong personality".

However, the effect of such dependence can be neutralized if a mediator is included in the conflict resolution process. In this case, a psychologically curious situation arises: if concessions are necessary, the parties make them, addressing not to each other, but to a third party. It is to her, as it were, that a “favor” is done in response to a corresponding request for a concession (usually in the form of advice, recommendations), but by no means to the opposite side. Thus, often the psychological steps of the opposing parties, the participants in the conflict, towards the mediator do not mean a concession to him, but rather a declaration of readiness to cooperate with him (and, consequently, with each other) in solving a common problem, while following some "rules of the game".

In the interests of the effective functioning of the team, the leader should not be drawn into all sorts of intra-collective conflicts, accepting the point of view of one side or the other.

It is most reasonable for him to be, as it were, “above the fight”. However, not in the position of an outside observer, which makes the organizational process unmanageable, but as a person interested in normalizing the interpersonal complications that have arisen, trying to influence the ongoing processes.

The role of mediator is very appropriate for this. In addition, the successful implementation of the intermediary function will increase his psychological authority, which is important in everyday management activities.

Ways to resolve conflicts

Structural methods.

Structural conflict management methods include: clarification of job requirements; formation of coordination and integration mechanisms, corporate goals; use of reward systems.

Explain job requirements.

This is one of the best management techniques to prevent dysfunctional conflict. It is necessary to clarify what results are expected from each employee and unit. Parameters such as the level of results to be achieved, who provides and who receives various information, the system of authorities and responsibilities, as well as clearly defined policies, procedures and rules, should be mentioned here. Moreover, the leader clarifies these issues not for himself, but conveys them to his subordinates so that they understand what is expected of them in a given situation.

Coordination and integration mechanisms.

This is another method of conflict management. One of the most common mechanisms is the command chain. Establishing a hierarchy of authority streamlines the interaction of people, decision-making and information flows within the organization. If two or more subordinates have disagreements on any issue, the conflict can be avoided by contacting the common boss, inviting him to make a decision. The principle of unity of command facilitates the use of hierarchy to manage a conflict situation, since the subordinate knows whose decisions he must carry out.

Equally useful are integration tools such as cross-functional teams, task forces, inter-departmental meetings. For example, when a conflict arose in one of the companies between interdependent divisions - the sales department and the production department - an intermediate service was organized to coordinate the volume of orders and sales.

Organizational overarching goals.

The effective implementation of these goals requires the joint efforts of two or more employees, departments or groups. The idea behind this methodology is to direct the efforts of all participants towards a common goal.

The structure of the reward system.

Rewards can be used as a method of conflict management by influencing people to avoid dysfunctional consequences. People who contribute to the achievement of organization-wide complex goals, help other groups in the organization and try to approach the solution of the problem in a complex way, should be rewarded with gratitude, bonus, recognition or promotion. It is equally important that the reward system does not encourage non-constructive behavior of individuals or groups.

The systematic, coordinated use of a reward system to reward those who contribute to the achievement of corporate goals helps people understand how they should act in a conflict situation so that it is in line with the desires of management.

Interpersonal conflict resolution styles.

Interpersonal methods of conflict management are methods in which at least two parties take part, and each of the parties chooses a form of behavior to preserve their interests, taking into account further possible interaction with the opponent. K.U. Thomas and R.H. Kilmenn developed the main most acceptable strategies of behavior in a conflict situation. They point out that there are five basic styles of behavior in conflict: accommodation, compromise, cooperation, avoidance, rivalry or competition. The style of behavior in a particular conflict, they point out, is determined by the extent to which you want to satisfy your own interests, while acting passively or actively, and the interests of the other side, acting jointly or individually.

The collaborative style can be used if, in defending your own interests, you are forced to take into account the needs and desires of the other party. This style is the most difficult, as it requires more work. The purpose of its application is to develop a long-term mutually beneficial solution. This style requires the ability to explain your desires, listen to each other, and restrain your emotions. The absence of one of these factors makes this style ineffective. This style can be used to resolve a conflict in the following situations:

It is necessary to find a common solution if each of the approaches to the problem is important and does not allow compromise solutions;

You have a long, strong and interdependent relationship with the other party;

The main goal is to acquire joint work experience;

The parties are able to listen to each other and state the essence of their interests;

It is necessary to integrate points of view and strengthen the personal involvement of employees in activities.

Evasion.

The avoidance style is usually implemented when the issue at hand is not so important to you, you do not stand up for your rights, do not cooperate with anyone to come up with a solution, and do not want to spend time and effort on solving it. This style is also recommended in cases where one of the parties has more power or feels that they are in the wrong, or believes that there is no good reason to continue contact.

It should not be thought that this style is an escape from a problem or an evasion of responsibility. In fact, leaving or postponing may be a very appropriate response to a conflict situation, as it may resolve itself in the meantime, or you can deal with it later when you have sufficient information and a desire to resolve it.

Smoothing. With this style, a person is convinced that it is not worth getting angry, because "we are all one happy team, and we should not rock the boat." Such a "slicker" tries not to let out signs of conflict, appealing to the need for solidarity. But at the same time, you can forget about the problem underlying the conflict. As a result, peace and tranquility may come, but the problem will remain, which will eventually lead to an “explosion” sooner or later.

Compulsion.

Within this style, attempts to force people to accept their point of view at any cost prevail. The one who tries to do this is not interested in the opinions of others, usually behaves aggressively, uses power by coercion to influence others. This style can be effective where the leader has a lot of power over subordinates, but it can suppress the initiative of subordinates, creating a greater likelihood that the wrong decision will be made, since only one point of view is presented. It can cause resentment, especially among younger and more educated staff.

Compromise.

compromise style. Its essence lies in the fact that the parties seek to resolve differences with mutual concessions. In this regard, it somewhat resembles the style of cooperation, however, it is carried out at a more superficial level, since the parties are somewhat inferior to each other. This style is the most effective, both parties want the same thing, but they know that it is impossible to do it at the same time. For example, the desire to occupy the same position or the same premises for work.

This approach to conflict resolution can be used in the following situations:

Both sides have equally persuasive arguments and wield the same power;

Satisfying your desire is of little importance to you;

You may be satisfied with a temporary solution, since there is no time to develop another, or other approaches to solving the problem have not been effective;

Compromise will allow you to gain at least something rather than lose everything.

This style is characterized by taking the other side's point of view, but only to some extent. The ability to compromise is highly valued in managerial situations, as it minimizes ill will, which often makes it possible to quickly resolve the conflict to the satisfaction of both parties. However, using compromise early on in a conflict over an important issue can shorten the time it takes to find alternatives.

Solution.

This style is an acknowledgment of differences of opinion and a willingness to get acquainted with other points of view in order to understand the causes of the conflict and find a course of action acceptable to all parties. The one who uses this style is not trying to achieve his goal at the expense of others, but rather looking for the best solution.

Accommodative style means that you work with the other side, but do not try to defend your own interests in order to smooth the atmosphere and restore a normal working atmosphere. Thomas and Kilmenn believe that this style is most effective when the outcome of the case is extremely important to the other side and not very important to you, or when you are sacrificing your own interests to the other side.

The fixture style can be applied in the following most typical situations:

The most important task is to restore calm and stability, not to resolve the conflict;

The subject of the disagreement is not important to you or you do not particularly care about what happened;

Realize that the truth is not on your side;

Feel like you don't have enough power or a chance to win.

Just as no leadership style can be effective in all situations without exception, so none of the conflict resolution styles discussed can be singled out as the best. We must learn how to effectively use each of them and consciously make one or another choice, taking into account specific circumstances.

Personal Methods

This group focuses on the leader's ability to actively resist conflicts, meaning the following:

The use of power, encouragement and punishment directly in relation to the participants in the conflict;

Changing the conflict motivation of employees by influencing their needs and interests by administrative methods;

Persuasion of the parties to the conflict;

Changing the composition of the participants in the conflict and the system of their interaction by moving people within the organization, dismissal or inducement to voluntary leave;

The entry of the leader into the conflict as an expert or arbiter and the search for agreement through joint negotiations;

Negotiation

Of all the ways to overcome the confrontation of the parties, negotiations between them are the most effective. They are characterized by the fact that the parties are trying to achieve at least part of what they want, to make certain compromises. In order for negotiations to become possible, certain conditions must be met:

The existence of interdependence of the parties involved in the conflict;

Lack of significant differences in strength among the subjects of the conflict;

Correspondence of the stage of development of the conflict with the possibilities of negotiations;

Participation in the negotiations of the parties that can actually make decisions in the current situation.

Conclusions on the second chapter

Our study involved students from grades 9 B and 9 C of MBOU secondary school No. 2, Mikhailovka, they were tested according to the following methods:

Questionnaire A. Bass - A. Darki for the diagnosis of the state of aggression (adapted by A.K. Osnitsky). The questionnaire consists of 75 statements, to which the subject answers "yes" or "no"

The Bass-Darky technique allows us to determine the forms of aggressive behavior typical for the subjects. Using this technique, one can be convinced that aggression in different categories of adolescents has different qualitative and quantitative characteristics. At the same time, this technique makes it possible to obtain data on the readiness of adolescents to act in a certain direction. In addition, the results of the application of this technique allow us to draw some conclusions about the content of the motivational sphere of the child, since the choice of methods with really effective sense-forming motives.

The method of socio-psychological diagnosis of conflicts by K. Thomas

The test is designed to study the personal predisposition to conflict behavior of a person. In the questionnaire, each of the five listed options is described by twelve judgments about a person's behavior in a conflict situation. The questionnaire consists of 60 judgments.

The selected methods are valid, standardized, are classical methods for studying aggressive tendencies, correspond to age norms and research objectives.

At the first stage of the study, we identified the general level of aggressiveness and conflict, as well as identified specific types of aggressive tendencies that cause conflicts according to the methodology of A. Bass - A. Darki.

According to the results of the study, it was revealed that adolescents have a high level of verbal aggression. Verbal aggression is the expression of negative feelings, both through the form and through the content of verbal responses. Children, entering into a conflict, swear, scandal, name-calling, i.e. express their aggression through words.

The results of the study indicate that adolescents have the most pronounced aggressiveness, i.e. children do not own adequate ways of behavior, this is an internal state of inability to control their emotions, and not a negative attitude towards the world. Thus, according to the results of the study, it was revealed that adolescents have a fairly high level of aggressiveness, which is the cause of conflicts. Such types of aggressive behavior as resentment and negativism are practically not expressed in behavior.

The results obtained indicate that 27% of adolescents prefer the strategy of rivalry.

They seek to achieve satisfaction of their interests to the detriment of another. About 23% are ready for cooperation, that is, they come to an alternative that fully satisfies the interests of both parties. 20% of adolescents choose avoidance or withdrawal, which is characterized by both a lack of desire for cooperation and a lack of a tendency to achieve their own goals. About 17% can compromise as an agreement between the parties to the conflict, reached through mutual concessions.

The remaining 13% of adolescents prefer the strategy of adaptation - sacrificing their own interests for the sake of another.

Thus, the study showed that adolescents most often present strategies of cooperation and rivalry, and there are practically no strategies of avoidance and compromise.

Conflict management is a targeted impact to eliminate (minimize) the causes that gave rise to the conflict, or to correct the behavior of the participants in the conflict.

It is believed that the constructive resolution of the conflict depends on the following factors:

Adequacy of perception of the conflict;

Openness and effectiveness of communication, readiness for a comprehensive discussion of problems;

Creation of an atmosphere of mutual trust and cooperation;

Definition of the essence of the conflict.

The main most acceptable strategies of behavior in a conflict situation have been developed. They point out that there are five basic styles of behavior in conflict: accommodation, compromise, cooperation, ignoring, rivalry or competition.

There are several effective ways to manage a conflict situation. They can be divided into two categories: - structural and interpersonal.

The study of the problems of conflicts in organizations is very relevant in modern conditions.

As you know, an organization is always a fairly complex system and its functioning is subject to certain laws. Non-observance and violation of the latter can often be the cause of the emergence and development of conflicts, which can have serious and sometimes destructive consequences.

Definition 1

The very word "conflict" (lat. " conflictus”) - means “clash” (of opposing views and interests, a serious disagreement, a dispute with heated controversy, etc.).

Conflict is always a social phenomenon, proceeding from the very essence of the nature of social life. Organizational conflict should be understood as the process and system of interaction between groups and individuals, aimed at resolving existing contradictions arising from the clash of opposing interests, goals, positions, opinions, views, etc.

Conflict factors

The main difference between the external factors of the conflict and the internal ones in the first place is that they do not depend on the characteristics of the activities of the organization itself, which means that it is practically impossible to counteract them.

The main external factors of the conflict include:

• social polarization;
• economic and political instability;
• natural disasters
• deepening social stratification;
• social tension, etc.

Internal factors of conflict. They can be both objective (financial, economic, organizational, etc.) and subjective (psychological, personal) in nature. Comprehensive consideration of the totality of conflict factors is very important for the effective functioning of any organization.

The main causes of conflicts

For effective conflict management, as well as their prevention, it is very important to determine the causes of their occurrence as accurately as possible. An experienced manager who is well versed in the classification of conflicts, as well as in the causes of their occurrence, will always find it much easier to take effective steps to eliminate and prevent all these causes.

There are quite a few objective factors that can serve as a cause of conflicts. The main ones are: power and distribution of resources, status positions, prestige, career, and much, much more.

Ways to resolve conflicts

Conflict management is the process of purposefully influencing conflict. Conflict management begins from the moment a problem situation arises until the end of the conflict. This process includes measures for the prevention of conflicts, their diagnosis, forecasting, settlement and, finally, resolution.

A significant part of researchers in the field of conflict studies note that conflict management includes the following two main stages:

1. Stage 1- conflict prevention (consists of symptoms, diagnosis, prediction and prevention);
2. Stage 2- the end of the conflict, which includes the weakening, settlement, resolution, extinguishing, suppression, overcoming, suppression, and elimination of the conflict.

Remark 1

In this way, conflict management This is the most important task of the management of any organization. The effectiveness of conflict management largely depends on the level of competence of the organization's management.

Conflict management begins with its prevention, that is, with the creation of conditions that prevent its occurrence. If the onset of a conflict is inevitable, then conflict management begins with early diagnosis and more accurate forecasting of the prospects for the development of the conflict. As for the procedures for the settlement and resolution of the conflict, they are applied with the aim of already completing the conflict interaction.

Main signs of conflicts

Regardless of the originality and uniqueness of each conflict, it is still possible to identify the most common features that manifest themselves in styles of conflict behavior (which are also often called strategies, models or techniques).

Such strategies include, first of all:

• evasion (avoidance, withdrawal);
• fixture;
• compulsion;
• consensus (cooperation);
• compromise, etc.

Basic technologies and stages of conflict resolution

Conflict resolution consists of $3$ main steps:

• recognition of the conflict as an accomplished fact;
• institutionalization of the conflict (determination of the basic norms and rules in accordance with which conflict interaction should take place);
• legitimization of the conflict (recognition of these norms and rules, as well as their observance).

The main prerequisites for conflict resolution are:

• organization of the conflicting parties;
• readiness to recognize the legitimacy of the mutual demands of the parties and accept any result of the conflict settlement (even if it contradicts their interests to a certain extent, that is, a compromise);
• belonging of the conflicting parties to the same social community.

The technologies that are used in the process of conflict resolution can be divided into the following four main blocks:

• communicative;
• informational;
• organizational;
• socio-psychological.

The conflict resolution process can be broken down into three main steps:

• diagnostics of a conflict situation;
• choosing the best way to resolve the conflict;
• direct managerial impact, as well as an assessment of its effectiveness.

There are three main prerequisites that are necessary in order to begin effective conflict resolution:

1. the conflict must be mature enough;
2. the parties to the conflict must feel the need to resolve it;
3. the conflicting parties must have sufficient resources to resolve it.

Remark 2

It follows from this that the resolution of the conflict (that is, its complete completion) should be started after its settlement (or, in other words, partial completion).