It is common among people to visit the cemetery after Easter and clean the graves of the deceased. The Church welcomes this and even sets aside certain days to remember dead people, come to the graves and pray. But many people don’t know what they can take with them to the cemetery.

There are certain church rules for remembering deceased relatives in the cemetery, but these days few people adhere to them.

On memorial days, people go to the cemetery and bring Easter cakes and colored chicken eggs with them. It is generally accepted that if you put food on the grave, the deceased will be able to eat in the next world.

Various religions have memorial days and some allow food to be brought to the deceased. Christians also have a tradition of visiting the deceased at the cemetery, but the church is categorically against people bringing food to graves.

The Church explains that there is no biological existence on the other side of death, there is only a soul that does not need earthly food. The only thing a dead person needs is prayer. It is believed that in addition to prayer, one can help the deceased through alms and good deeds.

If the funeral in the cemetery was done for show, for their close relatives, they will not help the deceased person in any way. It is better to come to church, pray and feed the needy, remembering the departed.

What you can and cannot do at the cemetery on memorial days

On memorial days, you can see the presence of relatives at the cemetery, bringing food and strong drinks with them. They remember the dead near their graves.

The Church is categorically against such actions, and especially against drinking alcohol in a cemetery. It is believed that on memorial days you can only pray, you can remember the deceased with food at home in the circle of family and friends, remembering the dead with warm words.

It is possible to clean up the cemetery on a memorial day, but, as a rule, this is done before or after Easter. People come to the graves of their relatives, clean them and paint the fences so that on the memorial day everything will be done.

It was customary in Soviet times to commemorate a deceased person in a cemetery.

It is believed that bringing food to the cemetery became common during the Bolshevik era. Then the authorities did not strongly approve of the church, there were persecutions, and people often visited the graves of their relatives and prayed there.

Over time, visiting the cemetery has changed a bit. As a rule, people visit graves in the spring or autumn in order to fix the grave after winter and prepare it for the cold, paint and clean it. They brought food with them because there was a lot of work. It is believed that since those times it has become customary to commemorate the dead in the cemetery.

It is known that even before the Baptism of Rus', people performed various rituals at the graves of the dead and held feasts with delicious treats. With the advent of Christianity, this ritual completely disappeared.

The cemetery is a place where the world of the living and the dead connects. There are many different negative prejudices and signs associated with it that are common among people. One of the bad signs is the one that explains why a person fell in a cemetery. It is important to understand what such a superstition could mean, but if the interpretation is negative, you should not tune in to the worst, as this will only aggravate the situation.

Sign of falling into a cemetery

When coming to a cemetery, you should behave as carefully as possible, because if a person stumbles in such a place, then this is a harbinger of some problems. More serious dangers await if you had to fall into a cemetery. In this case, you need to immediately go home, wash yourself with holy water and cross yourself. After this, you should read the “Our Father” prayer three times.

There is another sign in Orthodoxy - the body of a dead man fell in a cemetery. Such an incident is considered a bad sign, indicating that there will be another funeral within the next three months. When you fall out of your wallet or pocket while visiting a cemetery, under no circumstances should you take them back. Place banknotes on the grave a relative or a person with the same name, which will be a kind of ransom. Otherwise, financial problems may arise. If a monument or cross falls in a cemetery for no reason, it means that the soul is not at rest, and it is tormented by unfinished business on earth.

To cancel the effect of the sign, it is recommended to wash yourself when you come home, and then perform the ritual. Bake pancakes and take them to the cemetery as a ransom. Go with pancakes to three graves with the same name as yours. Be sure to read the Lord's Prayer. After this, pancakes should be distributed near the church to people who ask for alms. It is important to remain quiet throughout and not talk to anyone.

In different countries, it is common for people to visit the graves of their ancestors. But only the Russian person has the most reverent attitude towards the cemetery, towards the graves. As Pushkin wrote:

Two feelings are wonderfully close to us -

The heart finds food in them:

Love for the native ashes,

Love for fathers' coffins.

Note that cemetery comes from the word treasure, which in turn comes from the verb to put, to lay down. But at the same time, as you know, treasure is a word meaning something valuable buried in the ground. And buried for the time being. So the word cemetery means that a treasure is buried there for the time being - the body of an Orthodox Christian, which will certainly rise on the day of the general Resurrection. The Russian cemetery is not a necropolis, as it has become fashionable to say. Necropolis means the city of the dead, and according to Orthodoxy, God has no dead. Therefore, a Russian cemetery is a place where deceased people (who have fallen asleep for a while) rest in anticipation of the resurrection. That is why our people treated the cemetery, the grave of their ancestors, as a sacred place.

Unfortunately, this concept has largely been lost today. But it remained in the genetic folk memory. This is evidenced by the fact that even unchurched people strive to visit the graves of relatives or friends. God has no dead... And our people come to their deceased relatives as if they were alive, as if on a date. People indulge in memories, reflect on their lives and try to somehow honor the memory of the deceased. They take care of the grave, renewing crosses, tombstones and monuments. And that's not a bad thing. However, we need to know that the deceased will not feel any better because their graves are well-kept and not forgotten. It will not make them feel any better from our thoughts about them, from the wish “may you rest in peace.” And is such a wish better than the prayer-request “With the saints, Lord rest the soul of your departed servant...”

When we take care of a grave, we show our respect, our love for the deceased by doing something. Of course that's good. The graves of deceased people close to us are a reflection of our soul. Neat and well-groomed, it expresses our love and memory. But the external manifestation of love means practically nothing to the soul of the deceased. But prayer is the greatest thing we can do in memory of the deceased, it is the deepest manifestation of our love for him. During prayer, the soul of the person praying receives peace and the soul of the deceased. And without prayer in the cemetery, you may feel sad and even despondent. And this, in turn, will be felt by the soul of the deceased, and then what kind of peace can we talk about?

The elder of our time, Archimandrite Kirill (Pavlov), spoke very well about the meaning of prayer for the deceased. “Death often strikes a person suddenly, and he, without making any repentance, also departs with his sins. He himself can no longer help himself by any means. A person can change his fate only when he is alive, doing good deeds and praying to the Lord for his salvation. It is in such cases that prayer for the departed is very necessary and provides them with the greatest benefit.

The time will come when we will see them. How joyful it will be to hear from them a word of gratitude for prayer! They will say: “You remembered me, did not forget me and helped me in my time of need. I thank you.” And on the contrary: how bitter it will be to hear a reproach to someone who did not pray for the dead! “You didn’t remember me, you didn’t pray for me, you didn’t help me in my hour of need, I reproach you.”

The state of the deceased is similar to the position of a person floating on a very dangerous river. Prayer for the dead is like a lifeline that a person throws to a drowning neighbor. If somehow the gates of eternity opened before us and we saw these hundreds, thousands of millions of people rushing to a peaceful refuge, then no matter what heart would be amazed and crushed at the sight of their fellow believers and half-blooded loved ones, without words calling out to our prayer help!

The best prayer for the dead is the collective prayer of the entire Church. Therefore, before visiting the cemetery, one of the relatives should come to the church at the beginning of the service, submit a note with the name of the deceased for commemoration at the altar (it is best if this is commemorated at a proskomedia, when a piece is taken out of a special prosphora for the deceased, and then, as a sign of washing away his sins, they will lower him into the Chalice with the Holy Gifts).

The prayer will be more effective if the person commemorating this day himself partakes of the Body and Blood of Christ. After the liturgy, a memorial service must be celebrated.

When you visit a cemetery, you need to light a candle on the grave. And since the candle is often blown out by the wind, you should have a special closed candlestick for it, which is sold directly in Orthodox Christian shops or in Orthodox shops. We can recommend contacting the Orthodox online store “Zerna”, where there is a large selection of such candlesticks. It also has special lanterns for lighting candles. Such lanterns were traditionally used by our ancestors. The resumption of such a tradition promotes respect for the Orthodox culture of lighting candles in the cemetery. Such a lantern is especially useful when a lithium is being celebrated at the grave of a loved one.

To perform the rite of litia in commemoration of the dead, a priest must be invited. If for some reason it is difficult to do this, then you can perform a short rite yourself, according to the book “The rite of lithium performed by a layman at home and in the cemetery.” You can even pray in your own words. After all, the main thing in prayer is our heartfelt disposition, a sincere appeal to God for the repose of the soul of a loved one.

Then clean up the grave and indulge in memories of the deceased. But not those that insult his memory, but those that move us to soul-searching thoughts.

There is no need to eat or drink in the cemetery; it is especially unacceptable to pour vodka on the grave - this insults the memory of the deceased. The custom of leaving a glass of vodka and a piece of bread at the grave “for the deceased” is a relic of paganism. There is no need to leave any food on the grave; it is better to give it to the beggar or the hungry. Archbishop John (Maksimovich) spoke about it this way: “Relatives and friends of the deceased! Do for them what they need and what you can. Spend money not on external decorations of the coffin and grave, but on helping those in need, in memory of deceased loved ones, on churches where prayers are offered for them.”

Unfortunately, external decoration of graves is becoming increasingly common. But take a closer look at different graves and you will see that a simple cross on a grave grass mound with fresh flowers looks natural and evokes a feeling of peace. Because the cross on the grave of an Orthodox Christian reminds us that God has no dead, that all the dead will one day be resurrected. That's why it evokes peace.

But the grave, crushed by granite and the huge block of the monument, evokes a heavy feeling. Is this why sobs are often heard at such graves instead of prayers, they drink vodka so that the deceased may rest in peace, then they sob again and leave, crushed by melancholy, like granite crushing the grave.

A cross, be it made of metal or wood, is more appropriate for the resting place of an Orthodox Christian than expensive monuments and marble tombstones. But, of course, the solution to this very delicate issue is a personal matter and is decided by each family individually.

“We will try, as much as possible, to help the departed, instead of tears, instead of sobs, instead of magnificent tombs - with our prayers, alms and offerings for them, so that in this way both they and we will receive the promised benefits,” said St. John Chrysostom.

That is why it is so soulful to make a donation to the temple or give alms to the poor with a request to pray for the deceased servant of God, calling his name. It is good to bring food for commemoration to church; a special place for this is the eve. Usually they buy cereals, boxed candies, juice, red wine, vegetable oil, eggs, pasta. These products are then given to those in need and will be a sacrifice made for the deceased.

However, as mentioned above, first of all it is necessary to pray for the departed. This is the most important thing we can do for those who have passed on to another world.

You found something similar to a magical lining on the grave of a deceased relative: coins, candles, packages, bags, a bottle, a scarf on a fence, or something else. What does this mean and how should you react?

A grave lining is a fairly common thing. They constantly write me alarming letters about certain finds discovered on the graves of deceased relatives. Here is a standard example: “Hello, Vladimir Petrovich! We were at the cemetery, and on a birch tree next to the grave of our father-in-law we found a white cotton scarf tied in a knot (grandmothers like to wear these). Please tell me, is this a cause for concern?”

There is no reason for the letter writer to worry. If the appearance of this scarf on the grave was of witchcraft origin (and, for sure, it is), a grave was simply selected that was suitable for a number of characteristics (gender, name, age of the deceased, etc.). For example, in some magical ritual it could be said that after certain manipulations, a knotted scarf should be left on the grave of a man with a name that coincides with the name of the object of witchcraft. Your father-in-law's grave met these criteria, that's all.

The vast majority of strange finds on graves have precisely this origin. With the help of cemetery magic, they cast and remove damage, make love spells and lapels, provoke or treat illnesses, solve the problem of alcoholism, etc. But, in any case, such things usually have nothing to do with the relatives of the deceased on whose grave a magical lining was discovered. A grave was simply chosen that was suitable for certain conditions of the ritual. For example, sometimes you need to do something on a grave located on the edge; on the grave where a man of such and such age is buried; at the grave where a woman with such and such a name is buried, etc. and so on. In order for my readers to better understand the essence of such phenomena, I will give specific examples.

One of the methods of causing damage to epilepsy is as follows: the attacker takes a certain number of chicken eggs to the grave where a person is buried who had the same name as the victim of the damage. A special spell is pronounced, then the eggs remain on the grave for a certain time. In compliance with special rules, the eggs are taken from the grave and later given as food to the person destined for spoilage. Soon the unfortunate man suffers his first epileptic seizure. When the disease enters the chronic phase, the attacks intensify precisely on the day of the month when the described cemetery manipulations were carried out. In this case, the attacker, of course, is not at all interested in the relatives of the person buried in that very grave.

One of the love spell rituals is performed in a somewhat similar way. The photograph of a beloved person belongs to a grave where a person of a similar age who had the same name is buried. A series of manipulations are performed, special spells are pronounced, and the victim of the love spell begins to experience mortal melancholy without the object of his passion. If the relatives of the deceased “at the wrong time” visit his grave, they, of course, will find an unrelated photograph, remove it from the grave and, thus, this time thwarting the attacker’s plan, but they themselves will not suffer.

It should be noted that rituals of various types are performed in cemeteries; knowledgeable people do not limit themselves to black magic. Graves can be used in the treatment of various diseases (including epilepsy), to rid a person of alcohol addiction, to relieve love languor, etc. If, after visiting the grave of a relative, you suddenly find a bottle of vodka on it, this may mean that someone is being spoiled for alcoholism, or, conversely, they are trying to save someone from drunkenness.

Thus, if you find some foreign objects (coins, chicken eggs, photographs, etc.) on the grave where your relative was buried, you should not panic. Most likely, this witchcraft has nothing to do with you. Why do I write: “most likely”? The fact is that sometimes some witchcraft linings on graves are still addressed specifically to the relatives of the deceased. Such deposits are usually discovered not at any arbitrary time, but on the eve of the memorial day, celebrated a week after Easter (the so-called “Red Hill”). Or on some anniversary of death. That is, exactly when it is reasonable to expect relatives to visit the cemetery for cleaning or memorial services. For example, you can find chicken eggs, coins or anything else that quantitatively matches the number of members of your family.

What should be done with such finds? Without touching the thing with your bare hands (use gloves, a bag, paper), you just need to remove it from the grave. But remember that Direct contact with these things is highly undesirable, so do not pick them up or step on them!

If, nevertheless, you have the feeling that you “caught something”, or you reasonably assume that the lining was addressed specifically to you and your family members, click on the button below and write me a letter.

Unfortunately, every person has to visit a cemetery several times in their life: to attend a funeral, restore order, or simply visit deceased relatives. At such moments, it is necessary to follow certain rules and pay attention to signs that will allow you to predict misfortune and prevent it.

The first and most important rule about what not to do is no alcohol and being sober when visiting a grave. If a person is drunk, he can say a lot of unnecessary words and thereby attract bad energy to himself or even anger the spirits. Subsequently, there may be retribution for insulting the deceased, so it is best to leave alcohol for the wake.

When faced with the loss of a loved one, you need to pull yourself together and try to see him off on his last journey with dignity.

Under no circumstances should you drink alcohol, although for many this seems to be the only way to dull the pain.

As mentioned above, drinking alcohol insults the memory of the deceased, and in order for his spirit to successfully leave the earth and not disturb people, the following rules must be observed:

Signs on the grave

As you know, the impossibility of placing a coffin in a hole due to its small size is a bad omen, but that’s not all: if the grave begins to collapse after burial, this may mean the imminent death of one of the deceased’s close relatives.

Some people believe that the appearance of ants on a grave is a bad sign, but it’s not at all like that: firstly, when visiting deceased relatives, people bring food - an excellent bait for ants, which is quite natural, and secondly, such insects do not breed at the burial site of bad people.

In such a situation, there is no need to worry: there is nothing wrong with the appearance of ants on a grave.

Why can't you eat in a cemetery?

When visiting the grave of the deceased, it is customary to bring food with you - cookies, sweets, pies.

This is necessary for the energy supply of the deceased, and he receives it from human food.

According to old beliefs, food brought to the grave should not be consumed, because... they no longer contain positive energy, and they not only will not bring any benefit, but can also harm a living person.

There is another interpretation: it is possible and necessary to eat food brought for commemoration, if only because over time they will disappear and begin to decompose.

However, the church does not approve of this, considering the habit of eating over the grave a relic of the pagan faith, when it was customary to remember the dead directly in the cemetery on the first Sunday after Radunitsa.

Who should not go to the cemetery?

It is not advisable for children and pregnant women to appear at the churchyard, because... they have weak energy protection.

If you neglect this rule, the spirit can move into a child or an unborn baby.

It is also not recommended for girls to visit graves during menstrual periods: it is believed that at this time the fair sex is dirty, and the evil spirits emanating from within can prevent the deceased from moving to the Heavenly Kingdom.

If you step on a grave

When a person accidentally steps on a grave, this can cause the wrath of the deceased buried in it. The ancient peoples believed that in this case it was necessary to immediately jump back and ask for forgiveness, but in any case, trouble would not be avoided.

If a person is drawn to a cemetery

It also happens that people are overcome by an irresistible desire to go to the cemetery. Most often, this desire worries for several months after the death of a loved one.

There is another explanation - strong energy. Some people feel peace and tranquility in the churchyard. There are two options here:

If, even after visiting a church and cemetery, the desire to go there does not disappear, it means that the spirits of loved ones need more frequent communication, and there is nothing wrong.

In order to avoid misfortunes, it is enough to follow a few rules:

Why can't you count money at the cemetery?

Another most common superstition is that you should not count your money over a grave. As you know, what you boast about, you will be left without.

A person who neglects this rule may soon notice a deterioration in his financial situation.

If even a lot of banknotes have fallen on the graveyard, it is best to leave them there and not pick them up, otherwise you can attract diseases and problems to yourself, for the solution of which you will have to spend a much larger amount.

If you fell in a cemetery

Very often at funerals people either lose consciousness or stumble due to their distracted state and fall.

In both cases, falling into a cemetery is a bad sign, foreshadowing illness or the imminent death of the person who has fallen.

To protect him from harm, you need to read the “Our Father” over him three times, sprinkle him with blessed water and cross him with a lit church candle.

If a monument to a close relative falls in a churchyard, this indicates that he is trying to remind himself of himself or talk to the living in order to predict a significant event or protect him from harm. In the latter case, to communicate with the deceased, you will have to turn to a medium.

Animals at funerals

After the death of a person, it is advisable to remove all animals, especially cats, from his home at least for a while: it is believed that they are the ones who maintain contact with spirits, and if necessary, the latter can move into them.

If a cat follows a crowd of people during a funeral procession, you need to carefully remove it to another place. You cannot kick or push with your foot, because... it may contain the soul of a deceased person.

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